Just the trigger warnings *trigger warnings: rape and suicide*

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Ive been blogging here as a way to try and keep a record of events for my own self use. Honestly this is my way right now of trying to process and let go.

I am crying again.... second time in two days. Second time in.... 4 or 5 years.... more than 2 drops? 18 years?

I made a professional rape crisis...
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belladonna:
omg dear! Now I understand what you said about being brutal in a blog post! What I can do from Brazil is sending her good energies so she can find her way to the light... and give you all the support you need!!!!

A lil holiday psa

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If you are food insecure please consider "foodstamps." Right now as a part of federal covid relief efforts, if your local state will give anything at all.... the united states federal government give the max federal benefits.... for a single person household thats an extra 250$ worth of food. Every month.

Hereeeeee we go? *trigger warnings.... multiverses, death, reality …

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Ok so here goes a fucking weird story about the absolutely mundane, but if its mundane why is my view of reality shifting so hard?

So nicotine cures my asthma faster than inhalers do... flat out. By minutes.... not the story.... story is mom cant stand the smell of some....

So i am agonizing between flavors.... lime or some garbage.... choose garbage. Mom cant stand......
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**Trigger warning: suicide**

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If youve been reading previous blog posts this might come as less of a shock, but the crazy abusive toxic ex... the one i had to confront in open court about my sexlife on the 29th.... she killed herself two nights ago. Its a bit of a shock.... im still processing.... thanks... ill be ok.

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unknowntrigram:
@headshot im still processing a ton...  the relationship...  the ending of the relationship...  the survivors guilt/savior desire bullshit....  a mental image....   thank you for your kind thoughts.
headshot:
@NOTANEMOBOY This is a difficult situation and rationalizing feelings can help. We don't choose what to feel, we can't choose how to feel about it

Fuck loose skin for real.

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According to bodyfat i should have visible abs, but losing 180 or so pounds seems to have left my skin a bit blown out....


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belladonna:
congrats for your process!! I know its not easy, but we are in this together!
unknowntrigram:
@belladonna thanks for helping by being a source of insperation.
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