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eugene or

Member Since 2004

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Monday Oct 10, 2005

Oct 10, 2005
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News: Porn Star to Relieve Katrina Victims

Outpouring of Assistance


Nearly two and a half months after the record setting bitch of a hurricane, Katrina, landed her fat ass onto New Orleans for the drenching of a lifetime, New Orleans, or Nawlens as it's called, will finally get some recompense.



"It's about fucking time," states Nawlens mayor "Diamond" C. Ray Nagin. "You think not having a place to stay for 2 and 1/2 months is hard? Try that on top of having no sex. These people need some committed bitches, who knows what they doin to drop down and pull out BJ's for these poor people, and, like, now!"



Booths will be set up to accomodate varying tastes and sexual styles, such as the crowd pleaser, doggystyle, and the avant-garde, "freestyle fuq and suqque" . Homeless Nawleenians will have the option of a money shot if they choose.
To provide top quality sex at no charge is like winning the lottery.



"I can't wait to pound Veronica Vixen ultra hard in the ass!! Proudly declares 12-year old Ryan Clark. "My dad's gonna let me go before him so he can coach me, and hold my gameboy!"
"He's not that big yet, of course," Concedes Mr. Clark. "so I think I'm gonna sneak in behind him and help out with a little DP, just for confidence sake."




72-year old Betsy Wheelin finds the whole thing appalling, yet, as she admits, shyly, a little arousing. "My, my, who'd want to ride those huge, pulsating, throbbing, man muscles, anyways? Disgusting!! Though I must admit they are more muscular than my husband. And I heard u get a free t-shirt."
We later caught up with Ms. Wheelin reserving her spot at the gangbang booth. "Well, I heard that we can get free t-shirts. I'm just doing it for the t-shirts." We'll see, Ms. Wheelin, we'll see.



I say it's about time corporations start giving back to this country. In this topsy turvy world of somethings or others, I think we should put a stop to no porn stars on the streets freely dispensing sexual favors.




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