unholypassion

I'm just drunk and roaming

So, I haven't updated my journal in awhile and I'm bored so here I am. All I've been doing lately is working and training. Sadly I had to take a break from smoking pot to build up my cardio and now I also have to start running every day. I guess I have to make sacrifices if I want to be a fighter. My hands...
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I got to see Danzig with Doyle. Cool show, except for getting my nose busted again. We drove down Wednesday night and came back Friday afternoon. I bought a Tiger Army cd while I was down there. It kicks ass. Right now I've been trying to get back into training hard after a coupla weeks off. I'm working on bobbing and weaving now and staying...
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I'm sorta drunk right now, and i just notoiced a hot girl requested me as a friend. Damn Bud light only givin me a buz. I haven't posted in a while. I've been sick. I just started training really hard again. My timiing seems off. I can't get combos off as good and I just felt like I was doing shitty the other day while...
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I just got back from the Misfits show.
In the pit I kept bumping into this hot punk chick with a trihawk. After she smiled at me a few times I wanted to talk to her but didn't know what to say. God, I feel like such a jackass. Why can't I be better at talking to girls I don't know. She looked so good....
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Sorta bored right now. Eating oatmeal. I don't post on here much because most of my time is spent at work, at American Kickboxing Academy or sleeping. I hope fighting works out. I'm doing good in sparring. I've been able to hang with people that have been there a coupla years and not get my ass totally kicked. Im getting more and more agressive during...
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Life is going better.
Still alone, but that's nothing new.
I'm doing good at kickboxing according to my instructors. I just need to keep putting more time in at the gym. I'm looking forward to beginning training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu soon, although I have to admit I'm nervous. Totally different from kickboxing, so it's going to be interesting.
Other than fighting there really isn't...
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My kickboxing training is going good. The trainers keep tellling me to not get frustrated when I make mistakes. I took a day off today because my legs were still pretty sore and I have a big welt on my right forearm from some kicks. It's good to get away from my personal porblems by training. It gets my mind off the pain for at...
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Why do I hurt those that I love the most
I feel like I'm losing myself
I'm afraid of what I'm going to do
I feel so alone in this cold place

Today was the first day of my kickboxing training. It kicked my ass. I'm hoping to start jiu-jitsu by next friday. That's about the only positive part of my life now. The girl I love is with someone else and I still see her everyday, which is tearing my heart to pieces. I feel so alone now. I just want to train as often as...
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CANTSPEAK

can't speak
can't talk
can't do anything they want

can't hide
or change your mind
gonna live w / all my soul
inside

can't speak
can't talk
can't stop for the reeling cause
or love
i told 'em all about it
can't talk
cause I'm already lost

can't think
can't cry
keep thinking of a suicide
it's hard
i just can't forget
gonna fade...
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"let the day begin
let the horror start
let the fury swell- let the skies all cry
let the day begin"

I need to get to sleep but I'm not tired so I figured I'd post here. I need a drink but there isn't any alcohol in this house. I know that when I try to go to sleep my two kittens are going to...
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