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unclenoah

Member Since 2003

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Friday Jan 12, 2007

Jan 12, 2007
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today they make cars differently than they made then what i was a youngster, hot-roddin' it around the asphault jungle.

when i was young, cars were made with an "accelerator" pedal, which you stepped on with varying degrees of force in order to coax the vehicle to travel at a desired speed. today's cars are built with a "go button" that the driver mashes to the floor in order to get the vehicle to travel at its top speed, regardless of circumstance.

back in my day, cars had a "brake" pedal that you'd apply to couter the momentum of the vehicle and bring it to rest -- usually this would take about a half a block or so. today's cars have a "stop button" that the driver also mashes to the floor in order to bring the vehicle to an immediate halt.

back in my day, cars came equipped with "headlamps" that were used for illuminating the road ahead during darkness. today's cars come with "daylight blasters" that are tuned and aimed so they light up the inside of the car in front of them brighter than the left field seats at Angel Stadium at a night game, and reflected off the rear-view mirror, blinding the driver of said car.

way back when, cars came with "turn indicators" which were little blinking lights on the sides of the car, which the operator would turn on to let folks in other lanes know that the driver intended to switch lanes or make a turn. today, drivers know that cars have "speed up lights" on the sides of the car that the operator can turn on when he wants the person in the next lane to mash down harder on their "go button" so they can successfully prevent the driver from moving his vehicle into the adjacent lane. when it's time to make a turn, these little lights aren't used at all.

so, if you find yourself frustrated on your drive home tonight, just remember that cars are a lot different in the 21st century and maybe you're just frustrated because you're looking at them with a 20th century mindset.

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