"If you start out depressed, everything's kind of a pleasant surprise." -Lloyd Dobler
Maybe I am insane. Maybe I am selfish. He's got a chilling case of now-or-never, and I'm circling him cautiously -- tip toe tip toe. He's ready to do cannonballs from the highboard. I'm water-wing clad, dipping my toes into the shallow end.
"I am so out of tune with you." -Jeff Tweedy, Wilco
I do know what I want. He wouldn't believe this for a second, but I've spent countless ticks and tocks of time trying to find it -- trying to recognize it, to grab it, to keep it. I do know what I want, and I only want it because it's rare. You wouldn't believe how rare. Each day I find myself getting better at appraisal. Cubic Zirconium is no longer as difficult to spot weaseling it's way onto someone's finger. Still, I'm cynical -- uncontrollably and nearly obnoxiously so. I don't want to doubt him, but the future foresees less pain for he who doubts and loses that for he who blindly believes and loses.
I require evidence. Somewhere in their 20's, if ever the ability was initially there, people become lazy -- they discard the drive and energy to supply proof. They want their word to be enough. They want to get on with it. Fittingly enough, sometime in their 20's, people let go of their ridiculous notions of romance, and are willing to forfeit all of their dreams of serenades and being chased and love letters and surprise vacations. I'm not satisfied. At 25, I'm not willing to toss those dreams. I think if I did, it would quite possibly be the worst mistake I've ever made. I would sooner live my entire life alone then forfeit thousands of tiny joys for the sake of being content.
I have to have the only thing worth having. Happily ever after.
"Name a babe, any babe in Seattle, I'll set you up with her."
"DIANE COURT."
He would probably say that I'm insatiable -- that I'm impossible to please. In fact, he does say that, but I know....
he knows better.
Maybe I am insane. Maybe I am selfish. He's got a chilling case of now-or-never, and I'm circling him cautiously -- tip toe tip toe. He's ready to do cannonballs from the highboard. I'm water-wing clad, dipping my toes into the shallow end.
"I am so out of tune with you." -Jeff Tweedy, Wilco
I do know what I want. He wouldn't believe this for a second, but I've spent countless ticks and tocks of time trying to find it -- trying to recognize it, to grab it, to keep it. I do know what I want, and I only want it because it's rare. You wouldn't believe how rare. Each day I find myself getting better at appraisal. Cubic Zirconium is no longer as difficult to spot weaseling it's way onto someone's finger. Still, I'm cynical -- uncontrollably and nearly obnoxiously so. I don't want to doubt him, but the future foresees less pain for he who doubts and loses that for he who blindly believes and loses.
I require evidence. Somewhere in their 20's, if ever the ability was initially there, people become lazy -- they discard the drive and energy to supply proof. They want their word to be enough. They want to get on with it. Fittingly enough, sometime in their 20's, people let go of their ridiculous notions of romance, and are willing to forfeit all of their dreams of serenades and being chased and love letters and surprise vacations. I'm not satisfied. At 25, I'm not willing to toss those dreams. I think if I did, it would quite possibly be the worst mistake I've ever made. I would sooner live my entire life alone then forfeit thousands of tiny joys for the sake of being content.
I have to have the only thing worth having. Happily ever after.
"Name a babe, any babe in Seattle, I'll set you up with her."
"DIANE COURT."
He would probably say that I'm insatiable -- that I'm impossible to please. In fact, he does say that, but I know....
he knows better.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
xanotherdeadhero:
yeah, definatly dont do that
hobocop:
maybe i'm behind the curve, or maybe i'm just in denial, but i haven't given up on it either. good for us......., right?