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totallysomeone

Philadelphia,PA

Member Since 2003

Followers 76 Following 97

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Thursday Apr 23, 2009

Apr 23, 2009
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If music, movies, and video games have taught me anything (and its very probable that they did not) its that Satan loves guitar battles (and also fiddle battles).

This concept is weird to me. I mean, hes Satan! If Im not mistaken (and its very possible that I am) his job is to take the souls of the damned back to hell to torture them, right? Is this dude really that hard up for sinners that he needs to resort to being a common busker, performing in the middle of some deserted crossroad in the Southern Bumble-fuck just to make his evil ends meet? I mean come on, buddy. If you follow the Christian belief system, then anyone who doesnt accept Jesus is coming to high five you. Youve just got to have some patience, youll get a bunch of souls to perform your demon tortures on. Stop being so greedy and impatient oh wait, I guess you are Satan.

Besides stealing souls, and guitar battling blues musicians, did you know that Satan also loves cotton candy and riding on old wooden roller coasters? Yeah, theres a lot about Satan they dont tell you:

Satan is left handed.

Satan always wears his seat belt.

Satan will lend you money, and he wont ask you to pay him back if its under $20.

Satan actually doesnt like metal that much, hes more into jazz (hes also way into Zep).

Satan doesnt even like Harry Potter.

Satan wrote the episode of Happy Days where Fonzie jumped over the shark, it was based on true events.

So just think about all that before you go judging the man, er um.. demon. Hes more than a one trick pony, and he has gotten a bad wrap thanks to the liberal media. Next time you see Satan, why dont you just stop and say hi, you might find hes not that bad of a guy, once you get to know him.
belena:
Hey smile
May 6, 2009

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