torque

Oh... I want to come out and play...

Haha... but sometimes it's fun being untouchable.

-Sssssssssss

Thanks for the comment. I had an apt with a girl in Detroit for two years a while back and it was wonderful. Both of us were criminals and disreputatble types. (There is something very sexy about a girl in a black tight body suit with a combat knife in her teeth do a back flip into a tree.) We used to live CRAZY nights and spend the days curled up together so happy for each passing moment of quiet. Eventually she betrayed me though and I had a long hard homeless time after that. (Notably it led me to working for the government for the homeland security dept......)

The happy memories of those days I think got me invovled in this last girl too fast and too hard. This latest girl was fun and good looking, but in the end lacked the emotional maturity I need out of someone I date. Her hitting on my roommate really was more related to deep depression then actual attraction and I just wasnt going to wait for her to get her shit figured out. I am not here to save the people I date.

As for what I study, I have alot of majors........ I am getting BAs in International Relations (minor in international economics), Chinese Literature (with a second major attached to this degree in philosophy). I am also getting an education certificate and graduating with honors, two internships, one TAship, three study abroads, and two years as a RA. Therefore, the reference to chaos is both literal and figurative.

So what am I doing with all these degrees? Every government office and lots of businesses are offering me alot of money..... I plan to move to the West coast where I hear the girls are pretty and start using my bounty hunting license (I needed quick money once...) and get a private eye degree. I figure if I am in San Fran I can keep my chinese language skills in working order and all the sun will do good for my pale skin.

I am an adventuror. I work for no one. I have survived for years on nothing and I dont see how my capacity to make money should change my feelings on living a very spartan existance.

As for your experiences with the burlesque show.... I agree this community is easily divided into two broad categories. People who see this as porn and people who see this as erotica.

I think you and I fall into the erotica group. I find the pictures artful and deeply tastful. I am comfortable with the human body and feel that as a mature adult I can sit back and appreciate beauty BOTH as sexual and non-sexual. Not everyone works like that. I think this statement applies to the suicidegirls as well. Some of the shoots feel like well photographed porn. Some really seem to have personality and demostrate a distinct sense of self concept which is amazing.

Though being friends with a porn star can be fun....

Sorry for the long post.