It's been forever since I logged on! WHat's up people? Don't have much time, so I'll just post an article I recently wrote. 
Pic is from my most recent shoot. I cut my hair short again.
(An article I wrote for an online magazine)
By ToriBell
I am in a rather untraditional relationship. Im 23, female, and more attracted to women than men. However, I have a boyfriend. We both have sex with other women, sometimes together, but most often our other liaisons are separate parts of our lives. Oh, and we are also into BDSM. We are both switches (both tops and bottoms), but we also tend to be dominate in nature and sexuality, especially when compared to your average Joe or Anne.
I do not know who else he is dating/sleeping with at any time unless he tells me. If Im not allowed to be part of the deal, Id rather not know about her. For me, its not necessarily jealousy, but more a feeling of being left out. There are certainly problems with an open relationship, but I cannot imagine a relationship that would work better for me (or has been in the past). The BDSM aspects of our relationship are perfectly fulfilled when we find a female submissive that we can dominate together. One of the best sexual and romantic feelings Ive ever had was locking eyes with my bf as we both spanked a willing victim. It was a feeling of perfect understanding, a I know you, I can share this with you, this dark part of me, and that is really sexy.
Most polyamorous relationships I know of have more rules than my relationship with my bf. I sometimes wish I could put more rules on him and not have those rules apply to me, but I know that isnt fair. Our main rule is neither of us controls what the other can or cannot do, nor do we have a right to put rules on the other unless it affects us. For example, I would be very upset if he had sex with another woman without a condom on. That could possibly affect my health, so it is my business. Other than that, his sex life is his own, and mine is mine. In the beginning of our dating relationship, I was also having sex with other men, but that faded out over time as I realized they just werent doing it right.
Women are another issue altogether. I dont believe you can compare or rate sex with men and sex with women as if they were the same thing. There is something that is so different about having sex with women, so exciting, so indescribable. I understand sex with men better than I understand sex with women. I also have more sex with men (possibly because they seem to be more available and willing?). To be perfectly honest, Ive had a lot of sexual encounters with women through my freelance modeling work. I dont feel comfortable posing with men, yet Ill have sex with a woman I met just that day if I find her attractive (and even if a camera is rolling). I consider it one of the perks of the modeling/porn industry.
Im not sure what is so different about sex with women or why I have to have a special connection with a man in order for the sex to be satisfying. Is it perhaps because I see men as less safe? Have I overly sexualized women? I do tend to have relationships with men and casual sex with women. I often wonder why this is.
Another thought that comes to mind is if Ill ever find a perfect, equal threesome. Is it possible to find something with a woman like what I have with bf? Could there be a chance that they two could love each other? I suppose this is one of my greatest fantasies to be involved in a polyamorous threesome where I have both my girlfriend and my boyfriend and we live happily ever after all together.
Im afraid real life is just a tad more complicated. But a girl can dream, right?
Pic is from my most recent shoot. I cut my hair short again.
(An article I wrote for an online magazine)
By ToriBell
I am in a rather untraditional relationship. Im 23, female, and more attracted to women than men. However, I have a boyfriend. We both have sex with other women, sometimes together, but most often our other liaisons are separate parts of our lives. Oh, and we are also into BDSM. We are both switches (both tops and bottoms), but we also tend to be dominate in nature and sexuality, especially when compared to your average Joe or Anne.
I do not know who else he is dating/sleeping with at any time unless he tells me. If Im not allowed to be part of the deal, Id rather not know about her. For me, its not necessarily jealousy, but more a feeling of being left out. There are certainly problems with an open relationship, but I cannot imagine a relationship that would work better for me (or has been in the past). The BDSM aspects of our relationship are perfectly fulfilled when we find a female submissive that we can dominate together. One of the best sexual and romantic feelings Ive ever had was locking eyes with my bf as we both spanked a willing victim. It was a feeling of perfect understanding, a I know you, I can share this with you, this dark part of me, and that is really sexy.
Most polyamorous relationships I know of have more rules than my relationship with my bf. I sometimes wish I could put more rules on him and not have those rules apply to me, but I know that isnt fair. Our main rule is neither of us controls what the other can or cannot do, nor do we have a right to put rules on the other unless it affects us. For example, I would be very upset if he had sex with another woman without a condom on. That could possibly affect my health, so it is my business. Other than that, his sex life is his own, and mine is mine. In the beginning of our dating relationship, I was also having sex with other men, but that faded out over time as I realized they just werent doing it right.
Women are another issue altogether. I dont believe you can compare or rate sex with men and sex with women as if they were the same thing. There is something that is so different about having sex with women, so exciting, so indescribable. I understand sex with men better than I understand sex with women. I also have more sex with men (possibly because they seem to be more available and willing?). To be perfectly honest, Ive had a lot of sexual encounters with women through my freelance modeling work. I dont feel comfortable posing with men, yet Ill have sex with a woman I met just that day if I find her attractive (and even if a camera is rolling). I consider it one of the perks of the modeling/porn industry.
Im not sure what is so different about sex with women or why I have to have a special connection with a man in order for the sex to be satisfying. Is it perhaps because I see men as less safe? Have I overly sexualized women? I do tend to have relationships with men and casual sex with women. I often wonder why this is.
Another thought that comes to mind is if Ill ever find a perfect, equal threesome. Is it possible to find something with a woman like what I have with bf? Could there be a chance that they two could love each other? I suppose this is one of my greatest fantasies to be involved in a polyamorous threesome where I have both my girlfriend and my boyfriend and we live happily ever after all together.
Im afraid real life is just a tad more complicated. But a girl can dream, right?
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And it is That Time, Again.
So, Stopping By To Wish You a Happy Birthday (Sep 18), Darling.
Hope you have a Great Day.
And May ALL your Wishes Come True.
And this Special Day Brings You Happiness and Joy.