i left work at five hoping to get the keys to my new apartment.once i got to the place i was told we wouldnt be able to move in till the first.i found this news to be very low considering we need to be out of the house on that day.josh explained to me that he had told them a month ago we needed a week to move in.the apartment place isnt making me a happy tony.i just got back in from my nightly hour walk.i can't think of anything better than godspeed in my headphones.everything seems so beautiful and simple.my hands move as if playing cello.everything seems like a scene in a film.dark roads covered in trees and a slight few houses lit up.examining lights above garages.staring off to the sky counting stars almost bouncing as i walk.im not happy.when i go for my walks i feel good.listening to a live version of motherfucker=redeemer as my hands glided in the air reminded me of mandy rogers.well more so i thought about how in fourth,or was it fifth grade,i decided to learn cello becouse she wanted to.i had a crush on her for two years.kids from the middle school came to get people interested in orchestral.she showed a large interest in cello and i overheard this.i figured the key to her heart would be us playing cello together.somehow in my ten year old brain i thought that would be the perfect start.sadly i got sick and missed a few classes and realized i didnt have the patience for cello.this was also around the time that my dads friend gave me a pet duck.his name was ducky.i would go on walks around the block with that little gent.he was taken away from his mother too soon and died of dehydration.tonight i ate vegetable fried rice and my fortune was"watch your relations with other people carefully,be reserved"how odd since thats been a large thought lately.maybe sometimes i do expect too much of people.i remember how safe i felt with my headphones in chicago.waiting for the train,listening to suede.maybe headphones release some sort of happy chemical.
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