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tonkakatt

Member Since 2004

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Thursday Aug 31, 2006

Aug 31, 2006
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once again myspace is being gay!

I wish I had something interesting and creative to say, you could re-read my last journal if you want.

sometimes I feel like running away...far far away. I have too many responsibilities though, I can't drop it all and leave. too many pets to care for, a job, clients...blah! it never ends.

things are so-so between my sweetie and I...although today he mentioned his kids are coming to visit this month and his brother is also coming while the kids are going to be here. so I asked if I'd get to meet everyone...and he has the fucking balls to say...."I dunno, maybe" what the fuck??? implying that he wasn't going to have me around or something....ok maybe being around all 5 kids might be a bit much...but come on....at least give me the opportunity to decide if I can handle it or not.

ok...apparently I do have shit to say.....here's a rant I've been holding back for a while...

my sweeties ex wife convinced him to have a vasectomy, then she cheated on him, divorced him and married someone else. now even though she has 5 children she could still have a child with her new husband. (I'm told through sources that she had trouble with the last 3 pregnancies/deliveries and was told by Dr's not to have any more children) anyways....here's the kicker...this "born again" (go anti-religion!!! woo hoo! I feel more agnostic every day!) is going to become a serrogate (spelling???) mother for a couple from NJ. wtf????

and a "friend" of mine has 3 kids, aged 8, 5, and 3. she's had a boyfriend for at least 4 years. and finally divorced her husband earlier this year. she'd been talking about divorcing him for years, since before she got pregnant with her last child (who are all her ex husbands). anyways...knowing that she was planning to divorce him, and knowing that her last pregnancy was problematic (spelling???) and being told by Drs that she shouldn't have any more kids...she somehow convinced her now ex husband to have a vasectomy. she is still with her boyfriend who could knock her up at any time.
what the fuck is up with there women!!!!
ya know I'd like to have a kid someday and its bad enough that I have to deal with finding a decent guy....
who doesn't have too much "baggage"
I find one I think is worth it, who will be a good husband/boyfriend
a good parent
and he either turns out wrong for me
or now I've gotta worry about him being fixed/neutered!
because of his ex-fucking-wife!
GOD DAMNIT!!!!!

mad mad

*hops off soapbox*

sorry....

and to repost from my last blog:
so what does a girl like me want in life? in a relationship?

love...to know I'm loved, to be shown regularly in words and actions. unconditionally

security...to feel safe, not threatened by the one I'm with and that he'll be there to protect me from anyone else or support me in times that I have to do things on my own.

trust...I want to be able to trust the person I'm with. to know that everything they say, do and represent it the Gods honest truth, that they'd never lie to me or misrepresent themself or anything that they're doing.

so yeah...every man I've been with my whole life lacks one or more of these qualities at one time or another.
that pretty much sucks!


toodles! confused
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I went out tonight...and oh what a fun night it was.
we (the "Mongrel Bitches" which would translate into groupie with any other band but we are not groupies...we're bitches and don't make the mistake of calling us groupies) came up with a new "greeting" rather than say hi, shake hands or hug we now caress and fondle the breasts of the "bitch" we're greeting...or band member if the situation arises. lets just say my breasts haven't gotten this much action in a long long time...even the girls night out (Suzie's party) they didn't get fondled, caressed and groped this much. my own fucking boyfriend hasn't given them this much attention in weeks! or ever for that matter!!!
I also found myself onstage singing again. while more breast fondleing (and ass grabbing) was going on. now lets get something straight here...I can't sing...I completely suck...but there I was with the mic in front of me and 3 girls on 1 side and 1 girl on the other belting out the vocals to the chorus....Good lord! I hope no one video taped it...lmao!

I think I got hit on by the singer of one of the bands...its my understanding he's getting married soon.... he's always been very friendly at shows (his band is the one I was onstage singing with the last time) but I just chalked it up to "PR" for the band. he kept coming over to me and putting his arm around me and calling beautiful. he gave me a kiss on the cheek at one point. his guitar player Bob and his girlfriend (another "Bitch") are the only 2 people out of that crowd/circle of friends who have actually met my sweetie. I dunno...
overall it was one of the ebst nights out I've had in a while. it was a "going away party for fellow "bitch" Melissa. she's moving out of state and we're all very sad frown so a show was organized with some of her fav bands so we could send her off and say our goodbyes. now our boys in Mongrel are opening for Dizzy Reed's band "Hookers & Blow" this saturday night, so we'll all get together again one more time before she goes. I'm gonna miss her.

I'm off to poke about on myspace for a bit...nitey nite
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
thefreak:
How come, if I may be so nosy? Characters?

-TM
Aug 31, 2006
sweetassugar:
Hey I wanna go Saturday!! And are we talking about a band we both like with a vertically challenged lead singer? wink
Sep 1, 2006

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