tonkakatt

as my day has gone on, I've come to realize that even though I had a fucking blast last night, wearing high heels in a pit is murder on your feet, steel toed boots woulda been perfect, and I don't own any..odd considering how many shoes I own. I wasn't planning on going in the pit though....oh well. my whole body is tired and sore too.

I went to breakfast at a diner with a couple of coworkers before our training workshop today, I got an omlet with a side of fresh fruit, it was yummy! while we were there we saw Georgie, Cindy and I knew him so we went over and said hi, he just lost his wife of 47 years this past winter, the poor guy, I've never seen him so sad. he was pretty shaken up last fall when she initially went into the hospital, that was tough to see. he's a war Veteren, I've always know him to be big tough and strong, and I've known him since I was born.
I've never been comfortable around people who are dying, or have lost someone and are grieving. I never know what to say.
this is what someone told me recently..."Im not afraid to die i know i am going to die it is an eveniblity you must over come your fear of that it is comeing to everyone" and "i am ready for that i know when she passes she will be in a better place than this"
kinda true...but he is a FUCKTARD, so whatever. and as far as being in a better place...you place is what you make of it, some peoples lives suck and they do nothing proactive to change it....so then what...you should die to move onto a better place?? is that what he's saying? and sometimes life is difficult but you have to play the cards the life deals you. if you don't take care of yourself, no exercise, eat crap, and do drugs or whatever...then you can't expect to not have health problems when you're 50 or younger. (which was what I was discussing with him) sometimes people die..accidents, unexpected illness or whatever, when it happens to me I want to have lived my life, had fun, made a difference, experience all sorts of things. NO REGRETS! or shoulda, coulda, wouldas.
so where am I going with all of this....no where really, just felt like getting it off my chest I guess, seeing Georgie made me think. he married the love of his life, they raised 8 children together, made it though good and bad times. he's got beautiful memories of her and yes, lots of sorrow right now, but I think as painful as it is to lose someone I'd rather know them and experience life with them and make those beautiful memories rather than go through life miserable or alone.


another subject....
I'm doing laundry again. BLAH!!!! my sheets and down comforter, yeah yeah yeah I know....you're not supposed to machine wash down comforters. but it can be done, it just takes 6 hours for the damn thing to dry. hopefully it'll be dry by bedtime.