tmk

I have a friend (whom I greatly respect) tell me a little while ago that when she sees Asian American men campaigning or speaking up against how American (and Western society at large) emasculates us, she wonders if that couldn't be put to a more productive cause. My first reaction was to get upset and say "You don't understand", but then I stopped myself and told myself to calm down - of course she doesn't understand. We are different genders and races, so of course we can't fully understand the different issues both of us go through. And of course, lashing out in anger doesn't solve the problem - while it may provide immediate gratification (if it even does that), it doesn't help the other party empathize with your plight. The best thing you can do is calmly explain why you disagree.