Do you ever just want to shoot a friend in the head? Do you ever wonder why they are even your friend? Consider this situation: A very close friend of ours is going to school about an hour and a half away. This is supposed to be a very close friend who we have known for quite some time. When Mike and I got engaged I called this friend with the news and he seemed really excited. He said he missed us and then broke it to us that he would not be home for Halloween.....a holiday that we have celebrated with our friends for several years now. He claimed he had homework to do....although oter signs pointed to him throwing his own party (one we would definately not be invited to). Anyway he then went on and on about how he couldnt wait to come home for Thanksgiving so that he could see us. He then mentioned online several times since that point how he couldnt wait for break...how he couldnt wait to see us. Well guess what? Thanksgiving has come and gone and he has been home for several days and has made virtually no effort to contact us. Late last night he sent us an instant message asking what we were doing. By the time we got it and called him he was not able to get a ride over...and we had already been out all day and were not going all the way back to wear he lives to pick him up. That was about all the effort he made. Today I instant messaged him saying to give me a call if he wanted to hang out. Mike and I had plans to take mom and dad out to dinner for moms birthday but we told him we would be home by 8. Did he try to make plans with me? No. This friend has become so fucking flaky. The bullshit part is that I know he will expect to be in our wedding party....how the hell can I depend on someone who cant even give me a call when they are home from college? When Mike and I were "in town" near him we tried hanging out with him but he was having a dorm party.....and in his words "it wasnt really our crowd".
Not for nothing but Mike and I have always gone out of our way to accomodate our friends. I have thrown them birthday parties, sent them cards, made them cakes, called them, drove them everywhere, hung out with them when it was good for them. I am lucky if they call me on my birthday forget make an effort to actually see me. Do you think one of them sent us a card when they found out we got engaged? No. And yet for the past four years all we have talked about is "when Jess and Mike get married...". It used to just make me upset. Now I am pissed. I have had it. I am not putting any more effort into them. I get nothing in return....I couldnt find a shoulder to cry on if one of them (this particular friend and one other) fell on top of me in a drunken stupor. Bah.
I miss having close friends who care.
*EDIT*
This friend finally contacts us at 10 tonight. He had gone out to the movies with his parents. Fine. He wanted to come over with another friend who only got off from work at 11. They get here at 12:30. When they get here they ask if it is ok if so and so comes. Theres really no point in asking since so and so is standing right outside the door. All three of them had gotten dropped off...so it isnt like our answer even matters....not that we would say no anyway. So they all come in and they start drinking the alcohol they brought. They tell our friend Chris, who we had been hanging out with all night, that he would need to drive them home. Ends up so and so is really allergic to cats. We live in a one bedroom apartment so there isnt much I can do about it. So pretty much so and so has burning eyes and coughs the whole time...and complains. My problem is that so and so dosnt like hanging out with us....he has never said anything...but you can just tell. Yet, for some reason, the other two friends always drag him along. So every time he is over he sits there and then wants to leave. He actually made a few comments tonight that were not so cool. I will be telling our friends to please not bring him anymore....he really just pisses me off. At one point friend one and I were talking about the engagement. So and so asked what we were talking about. friend one told me to show him my ring. I held my hand up and mentioned we were engaged. He says "I dont trust women". Who the fuck says something like that?
So that is the end of that game. So and so can fuck himself and act like he is the most indie thing god ever created as if any of us give a shit. He can wear his hideous- paper thin -I am trying to hard- look at me -I am cool because I shop at a thrift shop -pants. He can take his little college radio show that sounds like shit and shove it. What good is an expensive college education that mom my and daddy pay for when you fail all your classes? When did sucking make you elite? Fuck that.
Not for nothing but Mike and I have always gone out of our way to accomodate our friends. I have thrown them birthday parties, sent them cards, made them cakes, called them, drove them everywhere, hung out with them when it was good for them. I am lucky if they call me on my birthday forget make an effort to actually see me. Do you think one of them sent us a card when they found out we got engaged? No. And yet for the past four years all we have talked about is "when Jess and Mike get married...". It used to just make me upset. Now I am pissed. I have had it. I am not putting any more effort into them. I get nothing in return....I couldnt find a shoulder to cry on if one of them (this particular friend and one other) fell on top of me in a drunken stupor. Bah.
I miss having close friends who care.
*EDIT*
This friend finally contacts us at 10 tonight. He had gone out to the movies with his parents. Fine. He wanted to come over with another friend who only got off from work at 11. They get here at 12:30. When they get here they ask if it is ok if so and so comes. Theres really no point in asking since so and so is standing right outside the door. All three of them had gotten dropped off...so it isnt like our answer even matters....not that we would say no anyway. So they all come in and they start drinking the alcohol they brought. They tell our friend Chris, who we had been hanging out with all night, that he would need to drive them home. Ends up so and so is really allergic to cats. We live in a one bedroom apartment so there isnt much I can do about it. So pretty much so and so has burning eyes and coughs the whole time...and complains. My problem is that so and so dosnt like hanging out with us....he has never said anything...but you can just tell. Yet, for some reason, the other two friends always drag him along. So every time he is over he sits there and then wants to leave. He actually made a few comments tonight that were not so cool. I will be telling our friends to please not bring him anymore....he really just pisses me off. At one point friend one and I were talking about the engagement. So and so asked what we were talking about. friend one told me to show him my ring. I held my hand up and mentioned we were engaged. He says "I dont trust women". Who the fuck says something like that?
So that is the end of that game. So and so can fuck himself and act like he is the most indie thing god ever created as if any of us give a shit. He can wear his hideous- paper thin -I am trying to hard- look at me -I am cool because I shop at a thrift shop -pants. He can take his little college radio show that sounds like shit and shove it. What good is an expensive college education that mom my and daddy pay for when you fail all your classes? When did sucking make you elite? Fuck that.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
mc_dove:
wow, it's like looking into a mirror. if college (that i'm paying for myself, by the way) has taught me anything, it's that most of your friends don't care for shit in the end. good thing we've got SG, huh? holla back, dawg-slice. 
courtland_17:
wow, i totally read this randomly, but i completely feel what you're saying. this exact situation has played out for me in different context many times, and i hope you rid yourself of so and so in quick and clean fashion.....kinda like ripping a bandaid off. 