tinsoldier

i'm getting sick.
left work early today to sleep and try to get ahead of it.

as far as my head and emotionally. it looks like i'm going to have another of my classic not-relationships with a girl i can't seem to stop thinking about.
met her while she was working at my usual bar.
got to know her a little and asked her out after she told me she had ended her last relationship.
she told me no, i'm not ready to date anyone. then the all time best can we still be friends line.
now i'm not the type to handle criticism or rejection like a petulant child.
i don't like having my ego bruised but, i'm a fucking adult.
give me the straight truth without trying to protect my emotions.
what i'm pissed about is basically she lied about not wanting to see anyone for a year or so to get over the last relationship.
this is just my paranoia and insecurity, however she bounces up and runs over to this other guy in the first second she notices him in the room.
that's fine i get it.
she likes him, she doesn't dig on me.
i can still be pissed she lied about it.