tinfoilhalo

I actually had something else I was going to write about here , but I'm too tired at the moment to sit in front of the computer for that long . Soooo...I decided to let you in on just how lazy I've become . Since its gotten so nad wrenchingly cold out , I tend to not take my garbage out to the pick-up area nearly as often as I should . At the moment I've got a Mount Everest size pile of trash towering out of my kitchen garbage can . At this point it's less about me being lazy and more about the sheer challenge of seeing how high I can stack my refuse until it comes toppling over and buries my kitchen . I call the game "Garbage Jenga" . It's a lot like the famous game of the same name (Minus the garbage part ) , except instead of removing blocks from a stack of blocks I'm trying to strategically place milk cartons , banana peels , and soda cans just so to prevent collapse . Presently the stack of trash is the size of a very small man or a very tall midget . It's a breathtaking sight to behold . Pretty soon the whole fucking thing's going to avalanche and "JENGA!!!!!" It's time to call the Haz-Mat team to decontaminate my apartment . It may be easier to just move .

If you'd like to play "Garbage Jenga" at home here are the easy to follow rules...

1 . You must be lazy .
2 . You must have a trashcan...and trash .
3 . You must NEVER pile anything that may rot and start to smell disgusting , as this may cause a "foul" that will lead neighbours to think that you have been murdering homeless people and storing their bodies in your place of residence .
4 . You must possess great skill and prowess at balancing and stacking . Try playing Tetris for awhile to get your skills sharpened before you jump right into Garbage Jenga .
5 . You must avoid having people over to your place who may knock over your masterpiece . I suggest only hanging out with people who are equally as lazy as you are , or at least people who can respect a good trash heap enough to not tamper with it .
6 . You must not have pets , rats , roaches , or a family of gypsies who like to rummage through your trash . These are known as "variables" and may bring your game to an abrupt and messy end .

Other than that....have at it!!! Use your skill to impress friends and win the admiration of your peers . Garbage Jenga...it's not just for hobos anymore .