To all of the people who dropped off your free pie requests in my last journal , your pie has been purchased and sent out to you . It should arrive in five to six business years . Sorry about the long wait , but don't blame me , blame the US Postal Service . Gee , I just thought about this and it probably won't even be edible at that point . You know , all green and fuzzy and un-appetizing . Damn shame to waste good pie like that . That sucks .
On a happier note , you know what would be great ? Full scale global nuclear warfare . What ? You don't think so ? Allow me to persuade you . Sure , millions of innocent lives would be wiped out in just a few minutes . Most of the survivors would probably die of radiation poisoning a couple of months later . After that , though... If movies and TV have taught me anything it's that radiation , although deadly and horrible in most cases , can create brand new , super powered , lifeforms . Wouldn't THAT be worth losing 2/3 of the world's population for ? I believe so . Mainly because I plan on being one of those 2/3 . I know that I want to be around to see giant carnivorous flying frogs and venemous squirrel/bears . Plants that can shoot fire and and vampire butterflies . Also , in a completely unexpected turn of events , all of the cockroaches in the world would spontaneously drop dead from excitement . " WOOOOO-HOOO!!!! The Earth is finally OURS!!! This is so freakin' AWSOME , I...GAHHHHHK!!!!!" . Oh , bitter irony .
A world full of horrible genetic mutations and NO cockroaches ? That sounds like a little slice of Heaven to me . Especially since the massive exposure to nuclear radiation will turn my flesh into a substance akin to titanium and I'll be able to shoot powerful bolts of lightning from my eyeballs . Plus I'll be able to sustain myself off of all of the Twinkies that survived the apocalypse . I do loves me some Twinkies .
On a happier note , you know what would be great ? Full scale global nuclear warfare . What ? You don't think so ? Allow me to persuade you . Sure , millions of innocent lives would be wiped out in just a few minutes . Most of the survivors would probably die of radiation poisoning a couple of months later . After that , though... If movies and TV have taught me anything it's that radiation , although deadly and horrible in most cases , can create brand new , super powered , lifeforms . Wouldn't THAT be worth losing 2/3 of the world's population for ? I believe so . Mainly because I plan on being one of those 2/3 . I know that I want to be around to see giant carnivorous flying frogs and venemous squirrel/bears . Plants that can shoot fire and and vampire butterflies . Also , in a completely unexpected turn of events , all of the cockroaches in the world would spontaneously drop dead from excitement . " WOOOOO-HOOO!!!! The Earth is finally OURS!!! This is so freakin' AWSOME , I...GAHHHHHK!!!!!" . Oh , bitter irony .
A world full of horrible genetic mutations and NO cockroaches ? That sounds like a little slice of Heaven to me . Especially since the massive exposure to nuclear radiation will turn my flesh into a substance akin to titanium and I'll be able to shoot powerful bolts of lightning from my eyeballs . Plus I'll be able to sustain myself off of all of the Twinkies that survived the apocalypse . I do loves me some Twinkies .
dick_shrapnel:
I'm all for full scale global nuclear warfare myself. I hope that i can end up with superpowers too. Hopefully I'd end up as a shapeshifter with mind control. That's like two of the awesomest powers ever combined. I could transform into the president and like pass a bunch of fucked up laws, and nobody would veto me because I'd have control over all of their minds. It would be so sweet.
saraphine:
Hey you! I think I'm back...it was a long cold winter of solitude, but I fought the good fight and now I am free to be ME again! I luv ya Foily