It's time for TinfoilHalo's Random and Offensive Humor Show!!!!! WHOOOOOOPEEEE!!!!
If you robbed a bunch of churches and stole all of their "Body of Christ" and "Blood of Christ" do you think that you could re-build Jesus like some kind of FrankenChrist? He'd be like the Six Million Dollar Man...but made out of snacks . Stronger , Faster , Tastier . He's probably up in Heaven just WAITING , going " Stop eating me and put me back together already!!!! Stop getting wasted off of my blood too while you're at it!!!!! "
These people who have paintings of Black Jesus or Hispanic Jesus are WAAAY off too . Jesus was a white guy . I've got proof . When you eat the "Body of Christ" it's a cracker , right ? Get it ? A "CRACKER" . Alright that one kinda' sucked , but they can't all be winners .
Do you think that retarded kids who have to wear helmets even know WHY they're wearing them , or do they think that being retarded is some kind of sport ? They're probably thinking to themselves "If I'm REALLY retarded I could get a scholarship and maybe go pro someday ." ( As a side note , professional retards don't like to be referred to as that .They usually prefer the term POLITICIANS . )
Is it possible for deaf people who speak with sign language to stutter ? If they get arthritis is it considered a speech impediment ? If they want to whisper do they have to put on gloves or something ? This is some confusing shit , man .
St. Patrick's Day is coming up soon . St. Patrick is the guy who drove all of the snakes out of Ireland , right ? So basically he was made a saint for being the world's first exterminator ? Why don't we canonize St. Orkin and St. Pest-B-Gone too ? Man , they'll make ANYBODY a saint won't they ?
Speaking of snakes...What would happen if you fed a snake Viagra ? Think about it .
If Catholics are forced to give up something for a whole month for Lent , why don't more of them just give up being Catholics or being religious at all for that matter ? That way you don't REALLY have to give up anything else AND you get to sin all that you want for a whole month completely free of consequence because it was your religion that made the rules in the first place , PLUS you would technically be a pagan for that month and pagans don't even believe in the concept of sin , do they ? This is a pretty good loophole folks , but it could possibly cause a paradox that could make the universe implode . It'd probably be worth it though I'll bet .
Well , that's enough blasphemy and politically incorrectness for now . I'll save up some more for next time . If God doesn't have a sense of humor I guess I'll see 'ya in Hell . Later .
If you robbed a bunch of churches and stole all of their "Body of Christ" and "Blood of Christ" do you think that you could re-build Jesus like some kind of FrankenChrist? He'd be like the Six Million Dollar Man...but made out of snacks . Stronger , Faster , Tastier . He's probably up in Heaven just WAITING , going " Stop eating me and put me back together already!!!! Stop getting wasted off of my blood too while you're at it!!!!! "
These people who have paintings of Black Jesus or Hispanic Jesus are WAAAY off too . Jesus was a white guy . I've got proof . When you eat the "Body of Christ" it's a cracker , right ? Get it ? A "CRACKER" . Alright that one kinda' sucked , but they can't all be winners .
Do you think that retarded kids who have to wear helmets even know WHY they're wearing them , or do they think that being retarded is some kind of sport ? They're probably thinking to themselves "If I'm REALLY retarded I could get a scholarship and maybe go pro someday ." ( As a side note , professional retards don't like to be referred to as that .They usually prefer the term POLITICIANS . )
Is it possible for deaf people who speak with sign language to stutter ? If they get arthritis is it considered a speech impediment ? If they want to whisper do they have to put on gloves or something ? This is some confusing shit , man .
St. Patrick's Day is coming up soon . St. Patrick is the guy who drove all of the snakes out of Ireland , right ? So basically he was made a saint for being the world's first exterminator ? Why don't we canonize St. Orkin and St. Pest-B-Gone too ? Man , they'll make ANYBODY a saint won't they ?
Speaking of snakes...What would happen if you fed a snake Viagra ? Think about it .
If Catholics are forced to give up something for a whole month for Lent , why don't more of them just give up being Catholics or being religious at all for that matter ? That way you don't REALLY have to give up anything else AND you get to sin all that you want for a whole month completely free of consequence because it was your religion that made the rules in the first place , PLUS you would technically be a pagan for that month and pagans don't even believe in the concept of sin , do they ? This is a pretty good loophole folks , but it could possibly cause a paradox that could make the universe implode . It'd probably be worth it though I'll bet .
Well , that's enough blasphemy and politically incorrectness for now . I'll save up some more for next time . If God doesn't have a sense of humor I guess I'll see 'ya in Hell . Later .
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
saraphine:
Oh and yeah, the entire cast of Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill! are the women that helped make me the woman I am today...
saraphine:
Oh yes, with Debbie Harry!! Horrifyingly awesome movie! And I thought your loophole was up there with the one in the movie Dogma! Good on ya matey!!