I just heard today that Sylvester Stallone signed on to do ANOTHER Rocky movie . Even if the last one was so fantastic that it warranted another sequel , which it most definitely was NOT , why the hell would you even bother doing it now???? Stallone's too old and hasn't made a good movie in over ten years . Whatever , I have a few ideas about what the next movie might be about...not that it matters if it even has a plot .
1 - ROCKY KONG - Rocky , who has been slipping further and further into dementia due to the massive brain damage that he has suffered from the numerous beatings that Carl Weathers , Mr. T , and Dolph Lundgren delivered to him , finally snaps and imagines he's a giant ape . He then runs amock in downtown Manhatten where finally he climbs a hot dog stand and is eventually shot down by an animal control officer with a tranquilizer gun . Laying there in a puddle of drool , Rocky slurs "ADRIENNNNN!!! " until he is kicked in the face by an angry homeless man who has laid claim to " The only crazy sumbitch on THIS block " . END
2 - Rock-N-Spock-N-Robots - Rocky is cryogenically frozen in the year 2001 . Far into the future , Rocky's cryogenic chamber is discovered by science officer of the U.S.S. Enterprise , Mr. Spock . While Spock is out scouting , the rest of the landing party comprised of Capt. Kirk , Dr. McCoy , and Ensign Jones is suddenly besieged by evil robots from a parallel universe . Ensign Jones dies instantly for some reason and Kirk and McCoy are captured . Spock , knowing he's badly outnumbered decides to thaw this ancient Earth man out to assist him in freeing his captured crewmates . Rocky , once he gets his bearings and comes to terms with the "Pointy eared space guy " that awakened him , decides that "No robot is gonna treat no person that's friends with pointy eared space guy bad " and sets out to meet the evil metal menace on the field of combat . The robots advance on Rocky and try to use their "Mental Disruptors" on him...to no avail . Rocky's battered cerebellum is immune to their brain debilitating weaponry . He proceeds to smash and pummel robots until there are none left to stand before him . Spock returns with the freed Enterprise crew and is stunned that Rocky has emerged victorious . When Rock goes into a moving , and practically incomprehensible , speech about " Dose robots was tough , but dey didn't have da eye of da tiger , and Adrien and Mickey was dere to believe in me , and dose Russians hated me , but Hulk Hogan tried to trow me outta' a wrasslin' ring , and den I was da champ , but I lost all my money and den..." . The crew quickly say thanks and jump in the shuttle back to the Enterprise . Rocky remained there...rambling on...until the planet was mercifully struck by a wayward comet and destroyed . END
ROCKY BUKAKKE - Rocky travels to Japan on a "Good Will" tour when suddenly his entourage is attaked by evil perverted Yakuza ninjas . The vile assassins try to defile Rocky by...Dear God!!!! I can't even go on with this . It's just too horrible . END
ROCKY VS. GODZILLA - While on his "Good Will" tour of Japan , this time perverted ninja free , the enormous prehistoric behemoth Godzilla attacks Tokyo yet again . Witnessing the city-wide destruction , Rocky asks the Japanese government if there's anything that he can do to help bring down the destructive reptile . They say that they have developed an enlarging ray that could be used to make Rocky the same size as the 30 story tall monster . The inspiring Rocky theme begins to play and Rocky gets that old twinkle in his eye . He turns to the group of scientists and says " I ain't gonna let him hurt no more innocent people no more . He ain't gonna hurt no one never again after I get through wit him . " The Japanese scientists go ahead with their enlarging plan despite arguing that a man who speaks worse English than they do has no chance of victory against Godzilla . As the monstrous beast rages through the city , Rocky yells out " Ay-O , Lizardface!!!! Why don't you pick on somebody your own size??? " The cheers of the hundreds of thousands of Japanese people drown out the confused roar of Godzilla . Rocky runs over and fearlessly goes into a flurry of jaw snapping upper cuts and rib cracking body blows . Godzilla reels back from the onslought and wobbles a little . Looking as if the Green Machine is about to go down , Rocky slowly approaches readying himself for the final blow . Suddenly Godzilla roars angrily and unleashes a powerful gout of radioactive fire from his jaws . Rocky is incinerated under the burning breath attack . The head Japanese scientist has just enough time to exclaim " SHIT. I forgot that he could breath fire . " before Godzilla stomps the laboratory, and eventually the rest of Tokyo , into rubble . END
These are merely a few of the countless possibilities that the Rocky franchise may decide to go with . I think that we can all agree though that whatever they choose , we couldn't care less . ROCKY , ROCKY , ROCKY!!!!
1 - ROCKY KONG - Rocky , who has been slipping further and further into dementia due to the massive brain damage that he has suffered from the numerous beatings that Carl Weathers , Mr. T , and Dolph Lundgren delivered to him , finally snaps and imagines he's a giant ape . He then runs amock in downtown Manhatten where finally he climbs a hot dog stand and is eventually shot down by an animal control officer with a tranquilizer gun . Laying there in a puddle of drool , Rocky slurs "ADRIENNNNN!!! " until he is kicked in the face by an angry homeless man who has laid claim to " The only crazy sumbitch on THIS block " . END
2 - Rock-N-Spock-N-Robots - Rocky is cryogenically frozen in the year 2001 . Far into the future , Rocky's cryogenic chamber is discovered by science officer of the U.S.S. Enterprise , Mr. Spock . While Spock is out scouting , the rest of the landing party comprised of Capt. Kirk , Dr. McCoy , and Ensign Jones is suddenly besieged by evil robots from a parallel universe . Ensign Jones dies instantly for some reason and Kirk and McCoy are captured . Spock , knowing he's badly outnumbered decides to thaw this ancient Earth man out to assist him in freeing his captured crewmates . Rocky , once he gets his bearings and comes to terms with the "Pointy eared space guy " that awakened him , decides that "No robot is gonna treat no person that's friends with pointy eared space guy bad " and sets out to meet the evil metal menace on the field of combat . The robots advance on Rocky and try to use their "Mental Disruptors" on him...to no avail . Rocky's battered cerebellum is immune to their brain debilitating weaponry . He proceeds to smash and pummel robots until there are none left to stand before him . Spock returns with the freed Enterprise crew and is stunned that Rocky has emerged victorious . When Rock goes into a moving , and practically incomprehensible , speech about " Dose robots was tough , but dey didn't have da eye of da tiger , and Adrien and Mickey was dere to believe in me , and dose Russians hated me , but Hulk Hogan tried to trow me outta' a wrasslin' ring , and den I was da champ , but I lost all my money and den..." . The crew quickly say thanks and jump in the shuttle back to the Enterprise . Rocky remained there...rambling on...until the planet was mercifully struck by a wayward comet and destroyed . END
ROCKY BUKAKKE - Rocky travels to Japan on a "Good Will" tour when suddenly his entourage is attaked by evil perverted Yakuza ninjas . The vile assassins try to defile Rocky by...Dear God!!!! I can't even go on with this . It's just too horrible . END
ROCKY VS. GODZILLA - While on his "Good Will" tour of Japan , this time perverted ninja free , the enormous prehistoric behemoth Godzilla attacks Tokyo yet again . Witnessing the city-wide destruction , Rocky asks the Japanese government if there's anything that he can do to help bring down the destructive reptile . They say that they have developed an enlarging ray that could be used to make Rocky the same size as the 30 story tall monster . The inspiring Rocky theme begins to play and Rocky gets that old twinkle in his eye . He turns to the group of scientists and says " I ain't gonna let him hurt no more innocent people no more . He ain't gonna hurt no one never again after I get through wit him . " The Japanese scientists go ahead with their enlarging plan despite arguing that a man who speaks worse English than they do has no chance of victory against Godzilla . As the monstrous beast rages through the city , Rocky yells out " Ay-O , Lizardface!!!! Why don't you pick on somebody your own size??? " The cheers of the hundreds of thousands of Japanese people drown out the confused roar of Godzilla . Rocky runs over and fearlessly goes into a flurry of jaw snapping upper cuts and rib cracking body blows . Godzilla reels back from the onslought and wobbles a little . Looking as if the Green Machine is about to go down , Rocky slowly approaches readying himself for the final blow . Suddenly Godzilla roars angrily and unleashes a powerful gout of radioactive fire from his jaws . Rocky is incinerated under the burning breath attack . The head Japanese scientist has just enough time to exclaim " SHIT. I forgot that he could breath fire . " before Godzilla stomps the laboratory, and eventually the rest of Tokyo , into rubble . END
These are merely a few of the countless possibilities that the Rocky franchise may decide to go with . I think that we can all agree though that whatever they choose , we couldn't care less . ROCKY , ROCKY , ROCKY!!!!
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
vrulovwrath:
Ofcourse it could be the old good Rocky who trains a new boxer (who ofcourse is going to be the champion) and ofcourse no matter the winings and all the days of glory he had the state doesn't give him money for the training so he has to train the young one with primitive means while the oponent is training with all the technology he can get yet still the dude that Rocky trains wins in the end.
vrulovwrath:
You have bein taged 