Me: Ahhharrrg!
Friend: What happened now?
Me: I just stabbed myself in the lip with my poppy.
Friend: How the fuck did you manage that?
Me: I didn't have enough hands. I was holding the poppy, my coffee and I needed to put my wallet back into my purse. So I stuck the poppy in my mouth.
Friend: Did it ever occur to you to put your coffee down or ask me to hold it.
Me: No.
Friend: You're a fuckin' retard!
Friend: What happened now?
Me: I just stabbed myself in the lip with my poppy.
Friend: How the fuck did you manage that?
Me: I didn't have enough hands. I was holding the poppy, my coffee and I needed to put my wallet back into my purse. So I stuck the poppy in my mouth.
Friend: Did it ever occur to you to put your coffee down or ask me to hold it.
Me: No.
Friend: You're a fuckin' retard!
Nothing quite works for me like found conversation. A little glimpse where I fill in all the other details.