tina

Skinny Vegan Boys by Tina Suicide

Im sick of the skinny vegan boy sitting in the spotlight of the corner
marketing his queerness while he steals my girl from my arms
they were simply platonic friends snuggling under covers watching tv
until I went away for a month a returned to:
the boy and I are practicing monogamy
when I leaned in to take in your breath with a kiss
and instead you left me without
with out breath
reaching grasping for when things turned around
for when you started digging boys
and when he started digging girls
and when I started digging myself a hole to bury myself into

she was just a girl not even of age when she slipped quietly into my bed and we made love for the first time under the shade of an ex lovers bouquet sitting pensively in a still water vase
my body quaked and shaked and trembled as my fingers explored her body and removed her short black skirt as the midwestern thunderstorms hit hard
She followed me out west and wrote songs about me that I would lap up like a kitten
And everyone would say How beautiful - how happy you must be
and we were


Im sick of the skinny white vegan boys spilling their guts on stage
under the spotlight
and it being revolutionary for them to whine on into the night
about girls who fucked them over and broke their tender hearts
while girls and genderqueers stand in the audience with a beer to nurse their insecurities
and make the cat calls, heckles, and harassment of this evening disappear
at the bottom of a second, third, or fourth beer
waiting patiently to take stage
instead of picking up the mic, the girl in the front row lets the skinny vegan boy take her home
he seems to be listening
he seems to understand
but he is really only gauging her social importance and calculating an approximation of how many poems he might be able to squeeze out of this relationship


we tore open this city like a birthin baby and made ourselves known
you and I would grab the mics from the boys at the open mic circuits
you armed with your guitar and I with my typewritten inky words
and he was there too
and of course he was mesmerized
they all were
and of course you were impressed
you always were
and of course you were more than friends
you just didnt tell me until it was so late in the game that I must be ignorant not to know by now
and of course there is no pity for ignorance

Im sick of opening magazines that I subscribe to and finding the skinny vegan boy playing the role of whoever they want him to be:
genderqueer
queer
feminist
you slip your hands and feet and arms and legs into these titles with such ease and I watch as the crowd applauds at the charade
but I was there and watched as you brought your arm around my girl trembling in fear that I might beat your ass for your blatancy
And I was there holding her calm and rocking her to bed when you became a controlling asshole
judging the child on her occupational sex work and criticizing her for her lack of control
dismissing the validity of polyamory
I was there as you embraced your straight male privilege and I now listen in the corner with
angry tears as I hear you invent this character which you say is you
or at least a fragmented piece of who you are
I understand the question marks behind labels that youve placed
but words with out actions are lies
and activists with out words
create change in our minds
and sometimes I think there may be just too many words floating around in your head
and I wonder if a silent hour wouldnt do you some good

Im sick of the skinny punk rock vegan boys takin up all the space with their narrow fitted hips
and the skinny punk rock vegan girls sucking their cocks for it
I gained 20 pounds when I became vegan over 4 years ago
jumping from 100 to 120 lbs
and I let my big ass sway down the sidewalk and take up as much space as I needed
and when I see a mic I grab it and take a bite into the crowd
and I dont apologize for steppin on the toes of the
skinny white ass
punk rock
vegan boys