my head feels like this: 
my heart feels like this:
swimming in frustrations. what do you do when you've used all your tools to resolve conflicts and issues, and 1. it doesn't work 2. other people won't step up 3. you can't tell what is justified rage and what is skewed by said frustration...
some answers i suppose...don't try to resolve it. sit with it. don't blame. just take responsibilty for yourself. what i really feel like doing is demolishing something. i've got an internal mob with torches marching towards several bridges, and if something doesn't shift, there's gonna be some burning soon.
the last month has just been fucking HARD. it's been treading water all the way...and today it's more like drowning.
i may be wrong in a hundred million ways. but right now i'd just like some understanding and compassion. probably mostly from myself. i've got so much locked up right now, with no outlet, and i feel so disempowered, that i literally can see it swimming before my eyes.
it's beltane tomorrow. who's coming down to the beach with me to build a bonfire big enough to burn all this away? will you jump over the flames with me? will you come make big juicy sloppy love with me on the sand to celebrate this human life? jump in the icy water to emerge clean and ready for the new?
well, if not with me, seek someone out tomorrow who needs it just as much as you.
my heart feels like this:
swimming in frustrations. what do you do when you've used all your tools to resolve conflicts and issues, and 1. it doesn't work 2. other people won't step up 3. you can't tell what is justified rage and what is skewed by said frustration...
some answers i suppose...don't try to resolve it. sit with it. don't blame. just take responsibilty for yourself. what i really feel like doing is demolishing something. i've got an internal mob with torches marching towards several bridges, and if something doesn't shift, there's gonna be some burning soon.
the last month has just been fucking HARD. it's been treading water all the way...and today it's more like drowning.
i may be wrong in a hundred million ways. but right now i'd just like some understanding and compassion. probably mostly from myself. i've got so much locked up right now, with no outlet, and i feel so disempowered, that i literally can see it swimming before my eyes.
it's beltane tomorrow. who's coming down to the beach with me to build a bonfire big enough to burn all this away? will you jump over the flames with me? will you come make big juicy sloppy love with me on the sand to celebrate this human life? jump in the icy water to emerge clean and ready for the new?
well, if not with me, seek someone out tomorrow who needs it just as much as you.
VIEW 16 of 16 COMMENTS
melodic_on_1200s:
i used to break things when i was a teenager. then i would realize i liked those things. i suppose i shouldn't like possesions so much but when it came to breaking hearts i was a pro. now it has all caught up with me and i just want to break myself. bonfire and sloppy whopper juicy love in the sand with some pacific ocean rinse sounds delicous. cheer up beautiful it will all work out
sixsixty:
thanks, i had a lot of fun on my little motorbike trip. did you get to burn anything this weekend?