Dreams of your visit are spun by my weary mind, and I am trapped in them like an angry butterfly caught in a spiders web, making me my own worst enemy.
The stars did shine bright in the summer night as your form fitted perfectly against mine. Such sweet pleasure to be cradled in your warm embrace; with my head pressed protectively against your firm chest, I simply listen to your heart beat steadily; a rhythm like metronome, it lulls me to sleep.
The dawning suns rays did seep through my eyelids, and I awaken, agape to a wonderful sight. Light bathes your glorious body reposed, and it glimmered and gleamed bright like a bronzed god or a statue made of ivory and gold. I felt like a child on Christmas morning.
My nimble fingers delicately brush your naked skin, tracing trails of lipstick blots, fading proof that you were once mine. Up-and-down, the prints follow like a rainbows end as if leading to fortune too treasured to be spent.
How dare the angel risk his wings and land himself in the untouchables bed? Its absurd, yet I believe it would be best to think nothing of it. In other words, do not question good happenings.
I can resist you no longer. My chaste kiss caresses your warm lips, and you stir at my tender touch. I stop, and I can feel your happy smile glowing beneath my face, and it returns my affectionate greeting with ardor, more so than before. You nuzzle at the nape of my neck, and your breath tickles my skin. The world feels so small in your strong arms. I feel safe, secure, and nothing can make this more perfect than to hear those three magical words from you. Your soft whisper echoes enchantingly in my mind, but instead of being wrapped in sheer bliss, I grow cold inside.
Your lovely visage drifts away from me like a favorite ribbon caught in a stream. No matter how tenaciously I try to salvage the token, this life is but a dream.
A sigh towards the bittersweet nightmare; whoever suggested I should relish in this forbidden fantasy should burn in hell! Your brotherly love does yet tease to torture, like hanging hope just an inch from arms reach. You leave me hollow inside, and that fact shall be buried with me, for it is my utmost desire not to pass this guilty burden on to you. My conscience suffers alone.
The painful pangs at my heart are harsh even at the mere sight of you. As youre walking by, you catch my eye, and you meet it with a cheeky grin. Its infectious. I feel faint; my heart beats at a dangerous pace, and blood runs red and fills my face. With so much power in a simple act, I turn into a lovesick puppy wanting to perform tricks for your attention. My brain dissolves into mush. I think I shall die from embarrassment, for no doubt your smile meant nothing more than innocent kindliness, and Id be a pathetic fool to try to dig beyond the surface of that. After all you are a taken man, been so for ages. Youre pledging your life to another, so what does that make me?
Meandering alongside the pier, I daydream of your wholesome face, leading me to guilty thoughts impure and unchaste; they send tingles down my spine. Seeds of desperation decide to grow like weeds for the unbridled passions basking this envisioned taboo, and so I yearn to strike my claim on you. To hunger for your taste of salty sweat, to get drunk off your heavy perfumed musk, to surrender to the feel of your fiery flesh upon my skin, to be ravished under the control of your callused touch.
With our forms framed, we fit like a well-pieced puzzle. A perfect mixture as we mate like two beasts in the throes of lust. Feel me rise as you kiss my mouth. Tell me how youve loved me best. Love me until your dry, but our bodies lie soaking wet. Together we would drown in the tide, and maybe then, I could happily die.
But its impossible! This cant come true; that is because in truth, you belong to someone else, and I am beneath you, a callow child in your eyes. Youre a man, and Im just a girl. Youve lived and loved before, and my journey has only just begun. I stand no chance. Youll never want me, so why do my thoughts still drift to you?
My heart is a hammering catastrophe, and the only control I hold is that over my cold stonewall faade, acting as if youre nonexistent. If all of womankind felt fervor for you under Eross spell, all but I would swoon or flinch, for Ive secretly pined for you so long already, hiding is done so naturally.
If I could forget you, I would, but I cant help this feeling. Affection is deep inside of me like an invisible wound, refreshed at the slightest brush, and despite etherizing it with miserable memories, such as that your other woman or of your leaving, my stinging love lingers for you still.
I am that mythical mermaid that lives beyond in mysterious depths of the sea. Foolish fishermen have long failed to prize me, yet you caught me so unwittingly. Though brief was our encounter, you are the epitome of my perfection: your tender heart and lively spirit, your unworldly mind and earnest strife. Its sad to say Im the only one dreaming of our potential life, and now you toss me back into the sea with no promise to return to me. You forevermore set me free like that of the unspoken truth of our lost union, forgotten.
I need solace and some peace of mind, to think straight, to wait, and sort out this mind-mangling mess. So I rest my eyes and wander the earths shore. Clearing my tired untrained head, I tune myself with nature. My foot falls gently, marking grooves in the smooth sand, and the rhythmic waves are music to my ears. I feel soothed, but as I return from wonderland, I fall in defeat as I recognize the shade of your dark blonde hair, and the hue of your blue eyes without a face, gazing back at me from the shoreline.
This isnt some silly infatuation! I cry. Oh, how I pray and wish it were so because if I heard right, then infatuation dies a sudden merciful death. How does one end their unrequited love? Can you love someone who can never love you back? Would my love for you be considered real? If not, I always thought love was unconditional.
I know my whole life has been so trivial and mundane compared to yours. Every moment cant all be considered extraordinary, but the few that are there, I cherish. They are mine. They made me who I am today, and Ill create many more in time. Just take a chance on me; spare me your time, and we might actually share some memories. It could be just for a week or for the rest of our life. You could be my first love, and I could be your last. I could be your bride someday, and be it you to take my innocence away. We could have children of our own. We could have it all. Maybe, if only you desired it.
Please, dont overlook me with that spineless excuse of if only you were older
Hush, and realize that I might actually want to grow old with you.
The fire in my soul wanes to die as I watch the sun-kissed peach horizon drown gold into the watery skyline. The air around me becomes colder in the blackening dusk, but it does not hold a candle to the frostbiting fortress forming around my lonely heart.
I give up, and Im ready to leave, but Im startled as Im being held back from behind; familiar arms wrap around me, warming my bare shoulders. Trembling under your friendly welcome, Im suddenly ignited, and I feel like bursting into flames. Spontaneous combustion or the rebirth of a phoenix, Im unsure; it happens so fast. The walls are charred and my guard is melted. Only you make it so easy. Please, have mercy.
The world felt so small under the security of our short embrace. My love so wrong, but it feels so right, clutching to one of seraphim. The stars are jealous albeit only for a moment. Oh, how I long for you to speak the words I can only hope for in dreams, and to my surprise, your whisper follows. Whether its fair or for simple favor, I do not know.
I recite your words back to you in question, You need me? What possibly for?
[written 2006 (Age 17) - also posted at SexAtTheBlog.com]
The stars did shine bright in the summer night as your form fitted perfectly against mine. Such sweet pleasure to be cradled in your warm embrace; with my head pressed protectively against your firm chest, I simply listen to your heart beat steadily; a rhythm like metronome, it lulls me to sleep.
The dawning suns rays did seep through my eyelids, and I awaken, agape to a wonderful sight. Light bathes your glorious body reposed, and it glimmered and gleamed bright like a bronzed god or a statue made of ivory and gold. I felt like a child on Christmas morning.
My nimble fingers delicately brush your naked skin, tracing trails of lipstick blots, fading proof that you were once mine. Up-and-down, the prints follow like a rainbows end as if leading to fortune too treasured to be spent.
How dare the angel risk his wings and land himself in the untouchables bed? Its absurd, yet I believe it would be best to think nothing of it. In other words, do not question good happenings.
I can resist you no longer. My chaste kiss caresses your warm lips, and you stir at my tender touch. I stop, and I can feel your happy smile glowing beneath my face, and it returns my affectionate greeting with ardor, more so than before. You nuzzle at the nape of my neck, and your breath tickles my skin. The world feels so small in your strong arms. I feel safe, secure, and nothing can make this more perfect than to hear those three magical words from you. Your soft whisper echoes enchantingly in my mind, but instead of being wrapped in sheer bliss, I grow cold inside.
Your lovely visage drifts away from me like a favorite ribbon caught in a stream. No matter how tenaciously I try to salvage the token, this life is but a dream.
A sigh towards the bittersweet nightmare; whoever suggested I should relish in this forbidden fantasy should burn in hell! Your brotherly love does yet tease to torture, like hanging hope just an inch from arms reach. You leave me hollow inside, and that fact shall be buried with me, for it is my utmost desire not to pass this guilty burden on to you. My conscience suffers alone.
The painful pangs at my heart are harsh even at the mere sight of you. As youre walking by, you catch my eye, and you meet it with a cheeky grin. Its infectious. I feel faint; my heart beats at a dangerous pace, and blood runs red and fills my face. With so much power in a simple act, I turn into a lovesick puppy wanting to perform tricks for your attention. My brain dissolves into mush. I think I shall die from embarrassment, for no doubt your smile meant nothing more than innocent kindliness, and Id be a pathetic fool to try to dig beyond the surface of that. After all you are a taken man, been so for ages. Youre pledging your life to another, so what does that make me?
Meandering alongside the pier, I daydream of your wholesome face, leading me to guilty thoughts impure and unchaste; they send tingles down my spine. Seeds of desperation decide to grow like weeds for the unbridled passions basking this envisioned taboo, and so I yearn to strike my claim on you. To hunger for your taste of salty sweat, to get drunk off your heavy perfumed musk, to surrender to the feel of your fiery flesh upon my skin, to be ravished under the control of your callused touch.
With our forms framed, we fit like a well-pieced puzzle. A perfect mixture as we mate like two beasts in the throes of lust. Feel me rise as you kiss my mouth. Tell me how youve loved me best. Love me until your dry, but our bodies lie soaking wet. Together we would drown in the tide, and maybe then, I could happily die.
But its impossible! This cant come true; that is because in truth, you belong to someone else, and I am beneath you, a callow child in your eyes. Youre a man, and Im just a girl. Youve lived and loved before, and my journey has only just begun. I stand no chance. Youll never want me, so why do my thoughts still drift to you?
My heart is a hammering catastrophe, and the only control I hold is that over my cold stonewall faade, acting as if youre nonexistent. If all of womankind felt fervor for you under Eross spell, all but I would swoon or flinch, for Ive secretly pined for you so long already, hiding is done so naturally.
If I could forget you, I would, but I cant help this feeling. Affection is deep inside of me like an invisible wound, refreshed at the slightest brush, and despite etherizing it with miserable memories, such as that your other woman or of your leaving, my stinging love lingers for you still.
I am that mythical mermaid that lives beyond in mysterious depths of the sea. Foolish fishermen have long failed to prize me, yet you caught me so unwittingly. Though brief was our encounter, you are the epitome of my perfection: your tender heart and lively spirit, your unworldly mind and earnest strife. Its sad to say Im the only one dreaming of our potential life, and now you toss me back into the sea with no promise to return to me. You forevermore set me free like that of the unspoken truth of our lost union, forgotten.
I need solace and some peace of mind, to think straight, to wait, and sort out this mind-mangling mess. So I rest my eyes and wander the earths shore. Clearing my tired untrained head, I tune myself with nature. My foot falls gently, marking grooves in the smooth sand, and the rhythmic waves are music to my ears. I feel soothed, but as I return from wonderland, I fall in defeat as I recognize the shade of your dark blonde hair, and the hue of your blue eyes without a face, gazing back at me from the shoreline.
This isnt some silly infatuation! I cry. Oh, how I pray and wish it were so because if I heard right, then infatuation dies a sudden merciful death. How does one end their unrequited love? Can you love someone who can never love you back? Would my love for you be considered real? If not, I always thought love was unconditional.
I know my whole life has been so trivial and mundane compared to yours. Every moment cant all be considered extraordinary, but the few that are there, I cherish. They are mine. They made me who I am today, and Ill create many more in time. Just take a chance on me; spare me your time, and we might actually share some memories. It could be just for a week or for the rest of our life. You could be my first love, and I could be your last. I could be your bride someday, and be it you to take my innocence away. We could have children of our own. We could have it all. Maybe, if only you desired it.
Please, dont overlook me with that spineless excuse of if only you were older
Hush, and realize that I might actually want to grow old with you.
The fire in my soul wanes to die as I watch the sun-kissed peach horizon drown gold into the watery skyline. The air around me becomes colder in the blackening dusk, but it does not hold a candle to the frostbiting fortress forming around my lonely heart.
I give up, and Im ready to leave, but Im startled as Im being held back from behind; familiar arms wrap around me, warming my bare shoulders. Trembling under your friendly welcome, Im suddenly ignited, and I feel like bursting into flames. Spontaneous combustion or the rebirth of a phoenix, Im unsure; it happens so fast. The walls are charred and my guard is melted. Only you make it so easy. Please, have mercy.
The world felt so small under the security of our short embrace. My love so wrong, but it feels so right, clutching to one of seraphim. The stars are jealous albeit only for a moment. Oh, how I long for you to speak the words I can only hope for in dreams, and to my surprise, your whisper follows. Whether its fair or for simple favor, I do not know.
I recite your words back to you in question, You need me? What possibly for?
[written 2006 (Age 17) - also posted at SexAtTheBlog.com]