I am going to try to keep this short, but we all know how hard that can be for me, so I'm making no promises.
I know I probably should be seeing a therapist or on some kind of medication, I know I have issues with depression and self-esteem, so that is probably the biggest reason why I can't meet anyone, but for now I have always found it a lot easier to meet women online and I'm am sticking with what I know.
I posted an ad on a few different websites, but I didn't get many promising leads and I have pretty much decided that online dating sites are just a little too obvious. I'd rather find someone and have our attraction to each other be based on mutual interests. I am not comfortable with the idea of simply talking to a girl just because I think she's hot.
As of now I have no real promising leads, but there are three different girls who I am somewhat drawn to, none of which I have yet to meet, some I have talked to quite a bit, but none are giving me 100% positive vibes.
The first girl I have been talking to almost every day, be it online, via text messages, or on the phone. She has a son and lives close by. She's funny and we have quite a bit in common, but she recently admitted she is still in love with a friend of hers that she's known for over seven years. He lives in England and they met while working on a comedy website together. They soon became best friends and would talk all the time. The feelings are mutual, but this girl knows it doesn't have a chance at happening because of the distance. I am glad she told me about this before we met as I'd be really resentful if we went on a few dates and then she dropped the bomb. It appears things are going to stay platonic, but she did say she considers me a friend. Out of all the responses she got to her personal ad, I was the only guy she wanted to talk to and she has made it clear she thinks somewhat highly of me, but there's been no talk of dating or romance.
The second girl responded to my ad and we haven't talked much. She has kids as well, but she has no other distractions and has been rather forward towards me. Our last conversation was riddled with innuendo and playful banter, which is fine by me as I always enjoy talking and joking about sex. It breaks the ice nicely and I always seem to impress women with how I avoid be overtly crude in how I talk. I admit, I enjoyed the double entendre, but I realized I still don't know much about this girl and I don't want to base my interest in her solely on what's in her pants.
Lastly, there is a girl who I have never had any private conversations with, but I have done a lot of flirting with on live TV. You see, she is one of the hosts of this local late-night talk/game show that is broadcast out of Lansing. I've been watching the show for about a year now and this girl has always been my favorite host. She's younger than me and has no kids. She's really attractive in my opinion and I really am into her personality and attitude. I was friends with her when I was on MySpace and I am now friends with her again on Facebook. The show she hosts utilizes text messaging and viewers send in messages to chat with the hosts and other viewers and to compete in the contests. Over the last few months, I have all but asked this host out every time I sent in a message. She knows I am into her and she always acts very happy to see me send in messages, she says how much she loves me and how I make her laugh all the time. She even made a comment about how she wants to have my babies.
All that sounds great, but I know it's just her way of being playful and polite because she always says how much she loves all the other viewers too. She's made playful comments to the other guys who watch too, so I can't really take her responses at face value. I appreciate it always, but I don't read too much into it. Recently though, I took a break from watching the show because it gets a little expensive to send messages in. Sometimes I have maybe taken a few days off of the show and when I come back, the girl is always happy to see me, but this time I took over a month off and decided to go back the other night.
As soon as she saw I sent a message in, the girl went silent and got a huge smile on her face. She went on to say how much she's missed me and wanted to know how I was doing, and of course that just did it for me and I started in with the flirting and hinted at asking her out. The show still owes me a couple gift cards I won earlier, the cards are for free massages at some parlor in Lansing. I mentioned how despite the fact that I can't use the cards where I live, I'd be more than willing to personally drive the 90 minutes or so into town to pick them up and how a massage would be a great date activity. HINT HINT.
Well, the host obviously didn't know what to say and she smiled, but after hearing what one of the other hosts had to say about me being so smooth, she almost made it sound like she'd be into it. She didn't say yes directly, but it seemed like she wasn't appalled at the idea. She just said how happy she was to see me back and so on. I then decided to take a shot and send her a message on Facebook. I may have come off as a bit desperate, but I tried to keep it honest. Her response only confuses things more and i wanted to know if I am just seeing what I want to see here or if maybe I should try being a bit more aggressive in my pursuit.
Here's the messages, edited to protect identities.
Me to her:
Hi *****,
I just wanted to let you know, I am only half kidding with all the flirting I do when I text into the show. I know there's bound to be a policy about you and the other hosts fraternizing with the viewers of the show and more importantly you don't need to feel obligated to go out with every guy whose eye you catch. I'll admit, I have always had a fondness for you since I started watching the show and I can't help but blush when I see how I've made an impression on you from my random messages.
Anyway, the fact of the matter is I get the impression that you're a really cool woman, you're beautiful, funny, and you've got some great taste in music. Can you blame me for getting smitten? I'm just glad that we can have fun with the little interactions we have on-air, it makes it worth sending in messages each night you're on.
Whatever the case may be, the offer still stands if you ever want to do lunch.
~Mark~
Her to me:
It's 7:04 in the morning, and I just opened this message and it just fuckin' made my day darling
You are always too kind, and I greatly appreciate it! You made my night tonight too when I saw your messages, I hadn't seen you drop by in a while and it made me really sad the past few weeks/months. I hope your doing phenomenal and I hope your having a great summer.....are you?!?!
I love our little random televised flirts as well darling
peace
*******
Now, is it just me or is there a chance that she really is into me? Why admit she enjoys the flirting if she has no intention of giving in? I suppose the only way to find out is to just be direct and ask her if she'd like to meet for lunch or at least exchange contact information and talk a little bit in private sometime, but I can't help but shake the feeling she is only being nice. Let's face it, all the messages I text in go towards her paycheck, so she's bound to want to keep people happy and coming back. I'd like to hope she's not stooping to using people's feelings against them, but I don't think she's like that.
So, any advice? Should I just give up on dating altogether? I seem to have lousy luck in finding anyone as it is, so maybe I just am not ready for relationships. That doesn't change how miserably lonely I am though and I think I am a good enough of a person to deserve a little happiness.
Am I nuts?
I know I probably should be seeing a therapist or on some kind of medication, I know I have issues with depression and self-esteem, so that is probably the biggest reason why I can't meet anyone, but for now I have always found it a lot easier to meet women online and I'm am sticking with what I know.
I posted an ad on a few different websites, but I didn't get many promising leads and I have pretty much decided that online dating sites are just a little too obvious. I'd rather find someone and have our attraction to each other be based on mutual interests. I am not comfortable with the idea of simply talking to a girl just because I think she's hot.
As of now I have no real promising leads, but there are three different girls who I am somewhat drawn to, none of which I have yet to meet, some I have talked to quite a bit, but none are giving me 100% positive vibes.
The first girl I have been talking to almost every day, be it online, via text messages, or on the phone. She has a son and lives close by. She's funny and we have quite a bit in common, but she recently admitted she is still in love with a friend of hers that she's known for over seven years. He lives in England and they met while working on a comedy website together. They soon became best friends and would talk all the time. The feelings are mutual, but this girl knows it doesn't have a chance at happening because of the distance. I am glad she told me about this before we met as I'd be really resentful if we went on a few dates and then she dropped the bomb. It appears things are going to stay platonic, but she did say she considers me a friend. Out of all the responses she got to her personal ad, I was the only guy she wanted to talk to and she has made it clear she thinks somewhat highly of me, but there's been no talk of dating or romance.
The second girl responded to my ad and we haven't talked much. She has kids as well, but she has no other distractions and has been rather forward towards me. Our last conversation was riddled with innuendo and playful banter, which is fine by me as I always enjoy talking and joking about sex. It breaks the ice nicely and I always seem to impress women with how I avoid be overtly crude in how I talk. I admit, I enjoyed the double entendre, but I realized I still don't know much about this girl and I don't want to base my interest in her solely on what's in her pants.
Lastly, there is a girl who I have never had any private conversations with, but I have done a lot of flirting with on live TV. You see, she is one of the hosts of this local late-night talk/game show that is broadcast out of Lansing. I've been watching the show for about a year now and this girl has always been my favorite host. She's younger than me and has no kids. She's really attractive in my opinion and I really am into her personality and attitude. I was friends with her when I was on MySpace and I am now friends with her again on Facebook. The show she hosts utilizes text messaging and viewers send in messages to chat with the hosts and other viewers and to compete in the contests. Over the last few months, I have all but asked this host out every time I sent in a message. She knows I am into her and she always acts very happy to see me send in messages, she says how much she loves me and how I make her laugh all the time. She even made a comment about how she wants to have my babies.
All that sounds great, but I know it's just her way of being playful and polite because she always says how much she loves all the other viewers too. She's made playful comments to the other guys who watch too, so I can't really take her responses at face value. I appreciate it always, but I don't read too much into it. Recently though, I took a break from watching the show because it gets a little expensive to send messages in. Sometimes I have maybe taken a few days off of the show and when I come back, the girl is always happy to see me, but this time I took over a month off and decided to go back the other night.
As soon as she saw I sent a message in, the girl went silent and got a huge smile on her face. She went on to say how much she's missed me and wanted to know how I was doing, and of course that just did it for me and I started in with the flirting and hinted at asking her out. The show still owes me a couple gift cards I won earlier, the cards are for free massages at some parlor in Lansing. I mentioned how despite the fact that I can't use the cards where I live, I'd be more than willing to personally drive the 90 minutes or so into town to pick them up and how a massage would be a great date activity. HINT HINT.
Well, the host obviously didn't know what to say and she smiled, but after hearing what one of the other hosts had to say about me being so smooth, she almost made it sound like she'd be into it. She didn't say yes directly, but it seemed like she wasn't appalled at the idea. She just said how happy she was to see me back and so on. I then decided to take a shot and send her a message on Facebook. I may have come off as a bit desperate, but I tried to keep it honest. Her response only confuses things more and i wanted to know if I am just seeing what I want to see here or if maybe I should try being a bit more aggressive in my pursuit.
Here's the messages, edited to protect identities.
Me to her:
Hi *****,
I just wanted to let you know, I am only half kidding with all the flirting I do when I text into the show. I know there's bound to be a policy about you and the other hosts fraternizing with the viewers of the show and more importantly you don't need to feel obligated to go out with every guy whose eye you catch. I'll admit, I have always had a fondness for you since I started watching the show and I can't help but blush when I see how I've made an impression on you from my random messages.
Anyway, the fact of the matter is I get the impression that you're a really cool woman, you're beautiful, funny, and you've got some great taste in music. Can you blame me for getting smitten? I'm just glad that we can have fun with the little interactions we have on-air, it makes it worth sending in messages each night you're on.
Whatever the case may be, the offer still stands if you ever want to do lunch.
~Mark~
Her to me:
It's 7:04 in the morning, and I just opened this message and it just fuckin' made my day darling
You are always too kind, and I greatly appreciate it! You made my night tonight too when I saw your messages, I hadn't seen you drop by in a while and it made me really sad the past few weeks/months. I hope your doing phenomenal and I hope your having a great summer.....are you?!?!
I love our little random televised flirts as well darling
peace
*******
Now, is it just me or is there a chance that she really is into me? Why admit she enjoys the flirting if she has no intention of giving in? I suppose the only way to find out is to just be direct and ask her if she'd like to meet for lunch or at least exchange contact information and talk a little bit in private sometime, but I can't help but shake the feeling she is only being nice. Let's face it, all the messages I text in go towards her paycheck, so she's bound to want to keep people happy and coming back. I'd like to hope she's not stooping to using people's feelings against them, but I don't think she's like that.
So, any advice? Should I just give up on dating altogether? I seem to have lousy luck in finding anyone as it is, so maybe I just am not ready for relationships. That doesn't change how miserably lonely I am though and I think I am a good enough of a person to deserve a little happiness.
Am I nuts?
morie:
I'd be wary of that third gal. The reason why she would admit to enjoying the flirting with no intent to give in is because that's what gets you to text her on the show, you said so yourself. Plus, you did already ask her to lunch and she avoided that in her response to you. At least the first girl said she was just interested in the friendship at this point. You could always see what happens with her too if you meet just as friends.