I haven't eaten since Tuesday morning, and I'm still not hungry. I have a total of 6 hours of sleep since then, and I'm still not tired. If I could stop eating and sleeping altogether, it would really open up a lot of time in my schedule. Not to mention the cash I'll save. I hope I don't forget and accidently eat or sleep. That would ruin everything.
I'm drinking shitloads of water, too. I haven't been in the habit of drinking water in years. Which could explain why my body isn't exhausted right now. The major downside is that I piss more than my grandmother now. Crystal clear, too. I usually have the perfect bladder for road trips. I never have to pee until I see a toilet. Now I have to piss as soon as I've finished pissing. It's like a night of heavy beer drinking, without the benefit of the beery goodness and brain fog.
So, what am I doing with all of my newfound time, you ask? Pissing. I just fucking told you that. Well, that, and I'm contemplating getting back in shape. I might have to axe the alchohol for a while, though, and that's gonna hurt. I'm out of money for cigarrettes, so I guess I'm quitting for the fourth time this month. If I do decide to eat again, then I'll start preparing my own meals once more. Lots of yummy goodness, and I actually know what I'm putting inside my belly. As for the gym.... Meh. I'm too fucking lazy. If I do go, I'll most likely end up an addict again, but what's the fucking point? The eating right and water will trim me back down again, and I no longer give a shit about getting big again. I was going to the gym two to three times a day, swimming once, running once and had no spare time, just so I could do what? Impress people? Fuck all that bullshit. I'll keep it in mind, but I don't expect to be blowing money on a gym membership any time soon.
What else is happening? Eh, stuff. Shit that I should probably put in my silly little journal, but in case you hadn't noticed, I don't much care for keeping a silly little journal these days. Some day possibly, but not today. I hope you've all been doing well, and if I have time tonight, I'll drop some comments and check out your entries. Later people.
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Update: 07/08/05
I got another hour of sleep today. That puts me up to 7. I considered eating, but all I did was stare at the food selctions, and then I decided that I still wasn't hungrry. I'm drinking coffee now, which is the first non water thing I've had since my replacement sammich the other day.
In real news, though, I've hurt someone who I care a lot about, and I feel miserable. I just reread something that I'd sent to them, and it's pretty obvious that I'm an asshole. There were misunderstandings that made it even worse, but the bottom line is that I'm definately a fucking asshole. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to think of some way to make it up to them.
***********
I talked to her, and I feel much better now. I still need to make it up her, though. My assholery shall not go unpunished. Or something.
***********
I think I'll go to the store and get some food. I'm still not hungry, but I suppose I should eat something.
***********
UPDATE: 07/09/05
I have food now. A can of SpaghettiOs to be exact. Poor folk viddles. It's sitting in my desk drawer, and every once in a while I open it, glance down and ponder whether or not to throw it in the microwave. It's inner turmoil to the max. Why am I not hungry? I'm going to end up like that guy from Thinner, aren't I? Sweet.
************
UPDATE!
STILL NOT HUNGRY!
I did, however, sleep for three hours today. Three WHOLE hours! Awesome. I somehow managed to miss 4 phone calls and 3 text messages during that time, even though the phone was right next to my face. Aparently I was tired.
I want a cigarette so fucking bad right now. I bummed a few yesterday, so now I'm going throug withdrawls yet again. Oddly enough, I'm not acting like a raging prick in the throws of a PCP freakout. I would really like to throw my computer down a flight of stairs, though. Preferably onto someone's head. And then I'll laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and kick them in the face and laugh and laugh.....
I'm drinking shitloads of water, too. I haven't been in the habit of drinking water in years. Which could explain why my body isn't exhausted right now. The major downside is that I piss more than my grandmother now. Crystal clear, too. I usually have the perfect bladder for road trips. I never have to pee until I see a toilet. Now I have to piss as soon as I've finished pissing. It's like a night of heavy beer drinking, without the benefit of the beery goodness and brain fog.
So, what am I doing with all of my newfound time, you ask? Pissing. I just fucking told you that. Well, that, and I'm contemplating getting back in shape. I might have to axe the alchohol for a while, though, and that's gonna hurt. I'm out of money for cigarrettes, so I guess I'm quitting for the fourth time this month. If I do decide to eat again, then I'll start preparing my own meals once more. Lots of yummy goodness, and I actually know what I'm putting inside my belly. As for the gym.... Meh. I'm too fucking lazy. If I do go, I'll most likely end up an addict again, but what's the fucking point? The eating right and water will trim me back down again, and I no longer give a shit about getting big again. I was going to the gym two to three times a day, swimming once, running once and had no spare time, just so I could do what? Impress people? Fuck all that bullshit. I'll keep it in mind, but I don't expect to be blowing money on a gym membership any time soon.
What else is happening? Eh, stuff. Shit that I should probably put in my silly little journal, but in case you hadn't noticed, I don't much care for keeping a silly little journal these days. Some day possibly, but not today. I hope you've all been doing well, and if I have time tonight, I'll drop some comments and check out your entries. Later people.
***********
Update: 07/08/05
I got another hour of sleep today. That puts me up to 7. I considered eating, but all I did was stare at the food selctions, and then I decided that I still wasn't hungrry. I'm drinking coffee now, which is the first non water thing I've had since my replacement sammich the other day.
In real news, though, I've hurt someone who I care a lot about, and I feel miserable. I just reread something that I'd sent to them, and it's pretty obvious that I'm an asshole. There were misunderstandings that made it even worse, but the bottom line is that I'm definately a fucking asshole. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to think of some way to make it up to them.
***********
I talked to her, and I feel much better now. I still need to make it up her, though. My assholery shall not go unpunished. Or something.
***********
I think I'll go to the store and get some food. I'm still not hungry, but I suppose I should eat something.
***********
UPDATE: 07/09/05
I have food now. A can of SpaghettiOs to be exact. Poor folk viddles. It's sitting in my desk drawer, and every once in a while I open it, glance down and ponder whether or not to throw it in the microwave. It's inner turmoil to the max. Why am I not hungry? I'm going to end up like that guy from Thinner, aren't I? Sweet.
************
UPDATE!
STILL NOT HUNGRY!
I did, however, sleep for three hours today. Three WHOLE hours! Awesome. I somehow managed to miss 4 phone calls and 3 text messages during that time, even though the phone was right next to my face. Aparently I was tired.
I want a cigarette so fucking bad right now. I bummed a few yesterday, so now I'm going throug withdrawls yet again. Oddly enough, I'm not acting like a raging prick in the throws of a PCP freakout. I would really like to throw my computer down a flight of stairs, though. Preferably onto someone's head. And then I'll laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and kick them in the face and laugh and laugh.....
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