Welcome back to my journal Sir or Maddam. Feel free to take up a seat by the fire. There's milk, cookies, and narcotics on the mantle if you wish to partake. I hope you enjoy your stay here.
I had some comments about writing, and I realized I wasn't clear. I know that I can write from anywhaere, and don't have to live in LA. The thing was, Kirkland (The guy who produced Adam & Steve) wants Sam to direct a movie for him, and Sam wants me to write it. But I talked to Sam, and told him I'm not trying to write anymore, because I don't like what I write. So I'm quitting that nonsense regardless of if I move back to Boston or not.
So as I mentioned yesterday, I had to get a haircut due to pending interviews, plus the "hairburns" were pissing me off. Now if you'll allow me to get sidetracked for a moment, I'm in the mood to digress. I don't look in the mirror very often. No particular reason why, other than the only one I have is in the bathroom, and when I brush my choppers, it's usually fogged up from my shower. Yes, I shower twice a day. That's what you get when you hate bad smell, but you're a smoker. But, I digress from my digression. Back to the mirrors. I usually look in the mirrors when I shave. But I'm too lazy to shave every day. So, I finally got around to shaving today, and I saw my hair for the first time since it was cut. I could tell when she cut it that it was too short, but I didn't realize just how short it was until I saw it. Godamn! If any of my superiors from the military saw me now, they'd be pissed, wondering why my hair was regulation length now, even though I refused to keep it that way while I was in. So there you go. You read all that to find out my hair is short. Good for you. The easy road is seldom the right one. Of course, in this case it was, and you should have skipped straight to the bottom, but the important thing is that you're instilling valuable life habits in yourself. Way to take the high road. As for me, fuck, there's no way in hell I'm pproofreading this. That's a long ass paragraph! Fuck that.
So.... What's your sign? You come here often? By any chance, was your father a meat burglar?
I'm a Sagitarius. Now, I by no means believe that the stars in the sky dictate my personality. I find that about as feesable as an almighty, all good deity who can't even control his own fallen angel. Which is another subject that I don't have the time or inclination to argue right now. Well, maybe I have the time, but I need to stay on track for once. The zodiac. What's a guy to do at three in the morning when he can't sleep? The obvious choice is to search the interweb to see what it has to say about your star sign you don't believe in. I am right, or am I right? When I found one on Sagittarius, I noticed that, other than the thrill seeking part, it was way off. Then I had a thought. Now, these don't happen very often, so I was mildly surprised when it happened. What the hell's a person supposed to do with a thought? I took a longshot, and decided to follow up on it. The thought went something like this: I was about 2 months premature. I was impatient as a fetus. When I freed myself, the doctors actually declared me stillborn. What a great thing to do to a first time mother. "I'm sorry maam, your child was born dead....... Oops, wait, no... apparently we jumped the gun on that one. But he will die. Very, very soon...... Look! Someone sent you flowers! Isn't that nice!" Navy doctors are pricks. I should know, I've worked with them. If you're wondering about the point, don't worry, we'll get there. Once I figure out where there is. Just stick with me kid, I'll get you through this somehow. Ah, I see a way out. I was two months premature right? Which means I was 'supposed to be' an aquarius. So I went ahead and looked that one up too. Surprise, surprise, this is what I found.
Aquarius, "good" attributes: Friendly and humanitarian... Dead on.
Honest and Loyal... Definately loyal, and honest, but only to those I'm loyal to.
Original and Inventive... I suppose so.
Independant and Intellectual... Most definately the first, as for the later, yes, my brain is an "intellectual", but we don't see eye to cerebelum. If he had his way, I'd be doing math and physics and shit
. What a nerd. I hate him.
Even better though, is the "Dark side of Aquarius"
Intractable and Contrary... Well, words such as "iconoclast" and "recalcitrant" have been used to describe me. Something I'm rather proud of.
Perverse and Unpredictable... They said perverse..... Sweet.
Unemotional and Detached... Well, that just describes what I'd like to be.
So, aquarius was actually pretty damn acurate for me. Which just goes to show you... You can make any belief seem true if you rationalize it enough.
But enough of that crap, now for some good, old fashioned bitching and/or moaning.
Why doesn't anybody listen to me? And by that, I don't really mean friends, or coworkers, or people in general. More specifically, why don't old women in the cars in front of me listen to me when my windows are up and music is blaring as I yell at them to go through the damn yellow light? What's the matter with them? Can't they sense that I'm yelling? Maybe I'm just not swearing enough. That's got to be it. Next time I think I'll go with, "Damnit you bitchass whore douchebag! Get the fucking fuck up there you fuck! Shitmotherfuckergodamn!!!" Yeah, that ought to do the trick.
I'm going to go through all of my past journal tonight and pick out the best one, so I can link back to it in my next entry, and give you all a blast from the past. Just in case you were wondering how much time I have on my hands... that's how much. Which do you think will win? Will it be: My first Greyhound trip? Or maybe, the Clint Eastwood voice over entry? And if you've been around long enough, you might remember The Wormhole!
Feel free to cast votes if you'd like
Do you realize all the shit you could have done in the time it took you to read this entry? You could have breezed through War & Peace, and still have had a spare moment to cure cancer. Think about that for a minute. On second thought, don't think about that. I don't want to change your mind about stopping by my journal again.
***************
And most importantly
While people are still struggling as a result of the tsunami, there's also been a lot of suffering here at home, as a result of the mudslides. Since I don't have the money to help right now, I'm trying to spread the word, at least until I can do more to help.
Please stop by Fractal's or Trilobyte's journals if you would like more information on upcoming events in support of the families who have been affected. Thank you.
I had some comments about writing, and I realized I wasn't clear. I know that I can write from anywhaere, and don't have to live in LA. The thing was, Kirkland (The guy who produced Adam & Steve) wants Sam to direct a movie for him, and Sam wants me to write it. But I talked to Sam, and told him I'm not trying to write anymore, because I don't like what I write. So I'm quitting that nonsense regardless of if I move back to Boston or not.
So as I mentioned yesterday, I had to get a haircut due to pending interviews, plus the "hairburns" were pissing me off. Now if you'll allow me to get sidetracked for a moment, I'm in the mood to digress. I don't look in the mirror very often. No particular reason why, other than the only one I have is in the bathroom, and when I brush my choppers, it's usually fogged up from my shower. Yes, I shower twice a day. That's what you get when you hate bad smell, but you're a smoker. But, I digress from my digression. Back to the mirrors. I usually look in the mirrors when I shave. But I'm too lazy to shave every day. So, I finally got around to shaving today, and I saw my hair for the first time since it was cut. I could tell when she cut it that it was too short, but I didn't realize just how short it was until I saw it. Godamn! If any of my superiors from the military saw me now, they'd be pissed, wondering why my hair was regulation length now, even though I refused to keep it that way while I was in. So there you go. You read all that to find out my hair is short. Good for you. The easy road is seldom the right one. Of course, in this case it was, and you should have skipped straight to the bottom, but the important thing is that you're instilling valuable life habits in yourself. Way to take the high road. As for me, fuck, there's no way in hell I'm pproofreading this. That's a long ass paragraph! Fuck that.
So.... What's your sign? You come here often? By any chance, was your father a meat burglar?
I'm a Sagitarius. Now, I by no means believe that the stars in the sky dictate my personality. I find that about as feesable as an almighty, all good deity who can't even control his own fallen angel. Which is another subject that I don't have the time or inclination to argue right now. Well, maybe I have the time, but I need to stay on track for once. The zodiac. What's a guy to do at three in the morning when he can't sleep? The obvious choice is to search the interweb to see what it has to say about your star sign you don't believe in. I am right, or am I right? When I found one on Sagittarius, I noticed that, other than the thrill seeking part, it was way off. Then I had a thought. Now, these don't happen very often, so I was mildly surprised when it happened. What the hell's a person supposed to do with a thought? I took a longshot, and decided to follow up on it. The thought went something like this: I was about 2 months premature. I was impatient as a fetus. When I freed myself, the doctors actually declared me stillborn. What a great thing to do to a first time mother. "I'm sorry maam, your child was born dead....... Oops, wait, no... apparently we jumped the gun on that one. But he will die. Very, very soon...... Look! Someone sent you flowers! Isn't that nice!" Navy doctors are pricks. I should know, I've worked with them. If you're wondering about the point, don't worry, we'll get there. Once I figure out where there is. Just stick with me kid, I'll get you through this somehow. Ah, I see a way out. I was two months premature right? Which means I was 'supposed to be' an aquarius. So I went ahead and looked that one up too. Surprise, surprise, this is what I found.
Aquarius, "good" attributes: Friendly and humanitarian... Dead on.
Honest and Loyal... Definately loyal, and honest, but only to those I'm loyal to.
Original and Inventive... I suppose so.
Independant and Intellectual... Most definately the first, as for the later, yes, my brain is an "intellectual", but we don't see eye to cerebelum. If he had his way, I'd be doing math and physics and shit
. What a nerd. I hate him.
Even better though, is the "Dark side of Aquarius"
Intractable and Contrary... Well, words such as "iconoclast" and "recalcitrant" have been used to describe me. Something I'm rather proud of.
Perverse and Unpredictable... They said perverse..... Sweet.
Unemotional and Detached... Well, that just describes what I'd like to be.
So, aquarius was actually pretty damn acurate for me. Which just goes to show you... You can make any belief seem true if you rationalize it enough.
But enough of that crap, now for some good, old fashioned bitching and/or moaning.
Why doesn't anybody listen to me? And by that, I don't really mean friends, or coworkers, or people in general. More specifically, why don't old women in the cars in front of me listen to me when my windows are up and music is blaring as I yell at them to go through the damn yellow light? What's the matter with them? Can't they sense that I'm yelling? Maybe I'm just not swearing enough. That's got to be it. Next time I think I'll go with, "Damnit you bitchass whore douchebag! Get the fucking fuck up there you fuck! Shitmotherfuckergodamn!!!" Yeah, that ought to do the trick.
I'm going to go through all of my past journal tonight and pick out the best one, so I can link back to it in my next entry, and give you all a blast from the past. Just in case you were wondering how much time I have on my hands... that's how much. Which do you think will win? Will it be: My first Greyhound trip? Or maybe, the Clint Eastwood voice over entry? And if you've been around long enough, you might remember The Wormhole!
Feel free to cast votes if you'd like
Do you realize all the shit you could have done in the time it took you to read this entry? You could have breezed through War & Peace, and still have had a spare moment to cure cancer. Think about that for a minute. On second thought, don't think about that. I don't want to change your mind about stopping by my journal again.
***************
And most importantly
While people are still struggling as a result of the tsunami, there's also been a lot of suffering here at home, as a result of the mudslides. Since I don't have the money to help right now, I'm trying to spread the word, at least until I can do more to help.
Please stop by Fractal's or Trilobyte's journals if you would like more information on upcoming events in support of the families who have been affected. Thank you.
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