thesatchmo2000

I JUST GOT IN TODAY FROM A TRIP PICKING UP A RELATIVE FOR THE HOLIDAYS. I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY FOR GAS TO MAKE A ROAD TRIP SO I TOOK A BUS. ON THE WAY BACK, I SAW NOTHING BUT FLAT LAND, GREEN HILLS AND NICE ROCK FORMATIONS. IT'S AMAZING WHAT POPS INTO MIND WHEN YOUR NOT BEING HYPNOTIZE BY ADDS OR CROWDED BY TRAFFIC INSIDE A METAL AND CONCRETE JUNGLE. I WAS READING "OF HUMAN BONDAGE" AND I GOT TO THE PART WHERE THE MAIN CHARACTER, PHILIP, REALIZES THAT RELIGION CAN BE CHALLENGED. THAT IF THERE IS ONE TRUE RELIGION, THEN OTHERS ARE DAMNED. SO THERE'S NO WAY TO DETERMINE WHICH IS RIGHT DUE TO THE FACT THAT EVERYONE HE'S LIVED WITH ARE BASICALLY GOOD BY HUMAN STANDARDS, BUT NOT BY HIS INSTILLED CHRISTIAN STANDARDS. SO HE DECIDES TO GIVE UP ON THE IDEA OF A GOD AND FEELS A GREAT WEIGHT HAS BEEN LIFTED. AND THEN I REMEMBERED IN HIGH SCHOOL, LEARING ABOUT EXISTENTIALISM. THEN I REMEMBERED THE TEACHER SAYING BASICALLY, THAT AS FAR AS EXISTENTIALISM GOES, NOTHING WE DO MATTERS AND HE WENT ON TO SAY THAT IT SEEMED THERE WAS NO POINT TO EVEN GETTING OUT OF BED EVERY MORNING. THEN "I HEART HUCKABEES" CAME TO MIND AND HOW BY ACCEPTING THE FACT THAT LIFE IS MEANINGLESS, YOU ARE FREE TO LIVE. AND THEN I LOOK AT WHAT I'VE BECOME AND REALIZED MY PROBLEM IS THAT I HAVE ALWAYS TRIED TO FIND MEANING FOR MY BEING ALIVE THROUGH BOOKS, MUSIC, RELIGION, WHILE I SHOULD JUST BE LIVING IT. I AM FREE DAMMIT!!? I MEAN WHY WOULD ANY GOD WANT ME TO WORSHIP 24-7 MAN? I MEAN IF I CREATED LIFE, I'D WANT TO SEE HOW IT GOES WITH OUT ANY OF MY INTERRUPTION. LIKE TRAINSPOTTING, CHOOSE LIFE! LIKE AUSTIN POWERS, IT'S FREEDOM BABY, YEAH!! THERE'S MORE BUT I CAN'T THINK OF ANY AT THE MOMENT.