theredbaron

So, I am fully settled in at school. My room is wonderful and my classes are smooth. 50 50 in general. Stats and Neuroscience are good, while emergence is dragging and the cell bio teacher is wet behind the ears, which isnt too fun. The class has appointed me as the correspondent between class and teacher, so I have the joy of telling the poor bastard all his Socratic shortcomings. Lucky me. Work is steady and I am plugging along.

Is it possible to have a mid life crisis at twenty?

Aside from classes, not too much to tell. Some interesting social stuff. I started hanging out with this girl a lot. It might have turned in to something, if she hadnt hastily proven her self to be mildly insane. For anyone wondering, asking all my friends if I am a worthwhile human being, and telling them all the bad rumors you hear about me is not my fetish. Good guess though, really.

I have got to get the fuck out of here.

Ive been really politically angry lately. Thanks in large to fetish photography being outlawed, as I am sure most of you have heard. I have lost much of my faith in the system. I dont know whether or not I believe in American democracy any more. Not when I see no recourse for my self, a newly made felon, despite the laws being completely contrary to my rights.

Is there any use in living if I loose the exuberance and passion, possibility and potential of my youth?

I have had luck so far lining up work for this field work term. There is a mess load of work available as research assistants in Boston. Finding something in the field of neurology seems like a cake walk. But now I am questioning my choice. If I can be of any use to the ACLU at this time, when my rights are being infringed upon, isnt it my civic duty to answer that call?

This place is so fucking dull.
How do I know Im alive if I live a pedestrian life?

Maybe. Well see. Ill call the ACLU. If they can use me for anything more substantive than a paper pusher, Im theirs.

I want to love life so much it hurts.

Im going home this weekend. Im staying for the big campus party on the 30th, and leaving Saturday morning to go see all my friends at home. I think itll be fun. Ill help out at Rocky, and help them settle in to the big theater. Im gonna try and join Trent for his SCA meeting on Saturday afternoon, and see Amy that same afternoon/evening.

Maybe it wont be so bad. Maybe mediocrity is more fun than it looks. Maybe you get used to it.

Apparently, Trent is heading some new burlesque night the new Man Ray, and has invited me to work at it. Its be pretty bad ass. I get to go for free, and build things, and whatever else needs doin. Win x3.

No. I can keep my passion. I just have to not accept anything less. Its as simple as that, really. I can do it. Im still half forty though.

In other news of things awesomely going my way, I may be getting that new camera Ive been hankering for. Cannon XT is what its looking like. Or the Nikon D50. SG is paying freelance photographers now, which is bad-ass. I am hoping it is retroactive so I can get moneys for Fenchurchs Nymph set. Heres to hopin.

Youth is so fucking beautiful. Can we please spend ours together? Burning so brightly, we hurt to look at? Wait, thats exactly what an old person would say. Still, say yes.

I have a lot of extra-curricular stuff on my plate this term. Politics, porn, play station and pranks. Also, some things that dont illiterate. Anyway, its 3:33, so I should get some bed. Math class at 10:00 tomorrow. I hate doing math on an empty head. So Ill see you all later. Soon if Im lucky.

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