This new site is rubbish. You can't even have a Saturday morning friends list cull without having to go the long way around. For me it takes the edge of it if there is effort involved. I wasn't to just go ZZZAAP....see ya.
Anyway I have a tale for you, which I may have told before on here but I don't care. A tale of my childhood nemesis. This is all B.C ( Before.Creamy)
From the first day in school when he made an elaborate spaceship out of lego and I smashed it to pieces with a densely packed lego ball, there was always something better about Chris.
My brother jokingly referred to him as 'God'. Probably because of the way he seemingly could do no wrong, and even from the age of 5 it was pretty clear that he was the best at everything. In between farting on my head, pointing out my imperfections, and me throwing knifes at him, this was one of the main conversations my bother and I would have. The 'How's god' one.
Now over time his powers seemingly grew a little weak. I was in the first team for Rugby and Cricket and he was nowhere to be found. He did probably have better exam results, but he seemed to loose his magic for a while near the end of school.
So when I left school I never compared my self to Chris anymore. The nemesis had just become a distant childhood memory. The god had become just a man.
Many years went by when I achieved very little. The life of a sound engineer was fun but paid very little. In reality I was really nothing but a university educated van driver. So I made what was to be the biggest turning point in my career. I started my own business. And much to everyones surprise it became a success.
At the pinnacle before I moved down to London I was pretty chuffed to have three successful businesses and had just done this major deal to secure the rights to England and wales, as well as a shop down there which was, I was told, one a the best property deals ever by a new business in the city of London....not bad.
So I went of down the royal mile to treat myself to a new guitar from sound control, and I was feeling pretty bloody chuffed with myself for being just so fucking great. when I hear a crowd roaring round the corner. I walked round to find out what was going on, what was so special to bring a crowd out to early on a Saturday morning. There, coming up the road was a double decker bus. It had an open top and a bunch of people standing on the top. As I got closer I couldn't believe my eyes. It was Chris. Now Olympic Gold Medal winner Chris Hoy. Parading though the streets of Edinburgh waving to the crowds as they cheered. Like a fucking hero, once again like some fucking God. The bastard.
I made a fart noise with my mouth and slumped off to the pub to drink beer.
I only mention this cause I bumped into him yesterday. We're going to meet up for a beer in London next time he's down. He was sickeningly nice to me so I couldn't say no. And to be honest it's not that I would want to anyway. He may well be my nemesis but he's still a friend and well it might be nice to maybe find out a few things he's fuck up over the years. Just like the rest of us. Fingers crossed anyway.
Anyway I have a tale for you, which I may have told before on here but I don't care. A tale of my childhood nemesis. This is all B.C ( Before.Creamy)
From the first day in school when he made an elaborate spaceship out of lego and I smashed it to pieces with a densely packed lego ball, there was always something better about Chris.
My brother jokingly referred to him as 'God'. Probably because of the way he seemingly could do no wrong, and even from the age of 5 it was pretty clear that he was the best at everything. In between farting on my head, pointing out my imperfections, and me throwing knifes at him, this was one of the main conversations my bother and I would have. The 'How's god' one.
Now over time his powers seemingly grew a little weak. I was in the first team for Rugby and Cricket and he was nowhere to be found. He did probably have better exam results, but he seemed to loose his magic for a while near the end of school.
So when I left school I never compared my self to Chris anymore. The nemesis had just become a distant childhood memory. The god had become just a man.
Many years went by when I achieved very little. The life of a sound engineer was fun but paid very little. In reality I was really nothing but a university educated van driver. So I made what was to be the biggest turning point in my career. I started my own business. And much to everyones surprise it became a success.
At the pinnacle before I moved down to London I was pretty chuffed to have three successful businesses and had just done this major deal to secure the rights to England and wales, as well as a shop down there which was, I was told, one a the best property deals ever by a new business in the city of London....not bad.
So I went of down the royal mile to treat myself to a new guitar from sound control, and I was feeling pretty bloody chuffed with myself for being just so fucking great. when I hear a crowd roaring round the corner. I walked round to find out what was going on, what was so special to bring a crowd out to early on a Saturday morning. There, coming up the road was a double decker bus. It had an open top and a bunch of people standing on the top. As I got closer I couldn't believe my eyes. It was Chris. Now Olympic Gold Medal winner Chris Hoy. Parading though the streets of Edinburgh waving to the crowds as they cheered. Like a fucking hero, once again like some fucking God. The bastard.
I made a fart noise with my mouth and slumped off to the pub to drink beer.
I only mention this cause I bumped into him yesterday. We're going to meet up for a beer in London next time he's down. He was sickeningly nice to me so I couldn't say no. And to be honest it's not that I would want to anyway. He may well be my nemesis but he's still a friend and well it might be nice to maybe find out a few things he's fuck up over the years. Just like the rest of us. Fingers crossed anyway.
VIEW 25 of 33 COMMENTS
It's good to be back.