thenewpope

Uuuugh, I have been in my pajamas all day. I know it is Xmas Eve, but I am not feeling it at all. Probably cause there is no money and I couldn't get gifts for anyone. Not that I wanted to spend one second in the mall this holiday season, but I was hoping to have something to give, or to at least have the money to buy stuff to make cookies or something. This sucks so bad. I even spent my gift money from my Mom on groceries. Woo. Not only that, but this is the first year of my entire life that my family has not been together on Xmas Eve making tamales. There will be none this year...it might seem dumb but it has been a tradition since before I was born and I have never missed it one time in 23 years. Even after my Tata died, we still did it, and we talked about him and we tried to make them just like he did. Why do things have to change? Xmas was always a time for warm houses, baking, parties and lots of family and friends. It just feels so very un-Christmasy this year. No tree no presesnts no cookies no family. Ba Humbug, I am starting to hate Christmas.