Ennui, or something like it...
Lately I've been afflicted with a decreasing will to live. It seems everything has lost its colour, its glamour. There's a lack of colour to everything, a grey light cast on my low life. I have no wish to do anything, to work, to play. I've posted on the boards about twice in the last week, when I usually post ten times a day. Not that any of you miss it.
I was just wondering if anyone else felt this way. It seems to be low-grade depression, but that's such a dumb word for it. Boredom, indifference, malaise; these are all much better words for it. It wouldn't lead to suicide; I don't want to kill myself. I just have the interest necessary to live. I may die of starvation, though. Hmm, I hadn't thought of that...
What I do do, though, is play Rocket Mania on Popcap games for hours at a time. I've gotten quite good, and am thinking of downloading the demo. But that might require more effort than I'm willing to put forth.
Lately I've been afflicted with a decreasing will to live. It seems everything has lost its colour, its glamour. There's a lack of colour to everything, a grey light cast on my low life. I have no wish to do anything, to work, to play. I've posted on the boards about twice in the last week, when I usually post ten times a day. Not that any of you miss it.
I was just wondering if anyone else felt this way. It seems to be low-grade depression, but that's such a dumb word for it. Boredom, indifference, malaise; these are all much better words for it. It wouldn't lead to suicide; I don't want to kill myself. I just have the interest necessary to live. I may die of starvation, though. Hmm, I hadn't thought of that...
What I do do, though, is play Rocket Mania on Popcap games for hours at a time. I've gotten quite good, and am thinking of downloading the demo. But that might require more effort than I'm willing to put forth.
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friday night they looked a little wore out, like they were tired of the whole thing. jack was wearing these weird harlequin freddie mercury tights, half red and half black, and they just were not as into it as i had witnessed before. this was also the last date for the current north american tour, so i guess that gives them an excuse.
they still rocked, mind you, they just seemed out of it.
-bobby
I have this tendency to sleep in 'til 6pm. then play some computer pinball or freecell. Then about 9pm I realize I should really go out and eat before I pass out. So I call my friends who aren't home and don't return calls. I go somewhere, eat alone then come home and play more games 'til the sun comes up.
On other days, for a bit of variety, I also go to work.
I'd kill myself but that seems more pointless than space cadet pinball.
ennui is the perfect word for it and it's seems to be the only thing i have the energy to talk about anymore.