thelastunicorn

all these cool sgs are gone... can't wait for my stupid subscription to expire

Sarah likes to leave the windows open in our house. It doesn't really bother me. I mean, it'll take her shit getting stolen at least once to teach her to lock up. But I'll be fucking damned if my shit gets stolen too. That's bullshit. So I said something about it, automatically she turns it into something about the electric bill. Like that's even the...
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oh, except the people on my friends list.

I'm only here cause I need new hairdo tips, you presumptive hipsters can go fuck yourselves. Which generally means Stuzzy, since he said some dumb shit about me. You know what the first thing Sue ever said to me? "That Kryptic guy is a tool, beware" So, I can assure you, the largesse of my cock, or its proximity to my boyfriend's asshole has...
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why are there so few half-assedly cool people in this world? there should be more of them. And I shouldv'e gotten laid this weekend damnit!

You wouldn't believe how lonely I am tonight. Ironing on a Friday night, what a blast, let me tell ya.

although i enjoy not being a monstrous fatass anymore (now I'm just the regular kind of fatass) i do kinda miss my slightly more melontastic boobage i used to have. Maybe I'm just imagining things but they used to be more... inflated. Or something. Anyway. They used to be perkier too. Motherfucking age. I hate being old. I'm just going to have to kill myself...
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*drool*

the more i think about it the more i am convinced i must own that pair of shoes.
i must drive to DSW and buy them before they are gone forever

there and the gap for some new jeans cause i got a gift card

There are ants everywhere. It sucks.