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thefreddy

Chi-City

Member Since 2004

Followers 182 Following 202

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Monday Mar 08, 2010

Mar 8, 2010
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What up ya.

This is gonna be short as hell, mainly because there's nothing going on.

Well...there is one thing going on.

I'm playing on the 12th(Friday) with the reggae band. Should be fun. I'm gonna go over the bass parts as soon as I'm finish with this.

Other than that, nothing much. Wow, I fail when it comes to excitement, don't I?

OK, I'll make up something:

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
So I was at the Oval Office, sitting with Barack. And I was like "Yo B! Why all these Republicans hating on you? You got fucking Glenn Beck calling you a commie-fascist or some shit like that. What's going on?"

Barack took a drag off the square that his girl don't know he got and was all "Man, white folks just be trippin' on a mahfuka. I mean I went to Harvard, did some organizing in the hood, try to do right. And MAN, dudes just trying to put a brotha down, y'know?"

"But you the president now."

"I know, I know. But still, people just bringing up all kinds of hate. Pure hate. Hate that hate can hate." Barack shook his head and took another puff of his square.

When, a big white dude in a black suit and shades stormed through the door. "I'm sorry Mr. President, but there's been a breach in security. Osama Bin Laden, Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Steele, and the zomibefied corpse of Adolf Hitler have entered the building. We must take you to bunker downstairs.'

"Bunker", I said, "When ya get a fucking bunker?"

Barack shot a worried look at me. "Oh, apparently since white folks still mad that a brotha is president, we installed a bunker at the bottom of the White House in case shit popped off."

I was still puzzled, but we didn't have time to figure it out. I told Barack to follow the Secret Service dude to the bunker and I'll stay here to kill all these dudes. "Hold up, meng." Barack said as he put his hand on my shoulder. "You're sure you can get these cats?" "Fuck yeah", I said with a smirk and a wink, "This ain't shit."

So Barack went with the Secret Service dude and I sat behind the desk waiting for Glenn, Rush, Steele and the rest to enter. It wasn't long before they busting through the door. And there they were: Glenn Beck, with the typical red, bloated face that has been exposed to millions of Americans each day. And next is Rush Limbaugh: a fat, patheic lil man with a small brain and probably an even smaller penis. He was panting heavily because they had to run all the way here.

Michael Steele was just fucking sad to look at. His skinny fame and oval face that was accented with wire-rimmed glasses. He kept fidgeting and looking around like he was forced to be here or something.

Next to Steele was Adolf Hitler, zombie version. I guess the election of a black president shock him so much he left his grave Which is weird because his bunker was blown up after he shot himself, so shouldn't he be in pieces? Whatever.

All their faces sunk when I saw me instead of the president. "Where...the...hell...is...Obama?" Rush managed to blurt out between pants. He then slumped backwards and plopped on the carpeted floor.

"I knew it!!" Glenn Beck shouted. "Barack Obama made a mini clone of himself. Of course!"

I interupted. "OK, Glenn, why the fuck would Obama make a mini clone of himself? That's just stupid."

"GGGGGGGGGGrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh...Destuchland", droned Hitler.

Michael Steele stepped forward and said to me, "Young man, I know you think this is stupid on the wack tip. Me and my homeboy are gonna get crazy fly with the honeys after we're done smokin' this fool Obama. I mean, Obama is straight buggin, B."

"First of all" I said putting a gentle hand on Steele's shoulder, "100 percent of what you just said got played outback in 1992. Frankly, you sound retarded. I'm sorry."

I backed away a few steps and addressed the group. "Second of all, ya should be ashamed of yourselves. You're going out here spreading all the lies and perpetuating fear mongering among the American people. The american people are strong, hard working, intelligent folks who are not as susceptible to cheap parlor tricks that you guys are performing. You're playing them for dummies, guys. Instead of separating the people between races, religions and classes, we should working together to build a better nation, so that it can reclaim its former glory that our forefathers saw when they wrote the United States Constitution. So whatta ya say."

"Hrumph", Glenn said with an upturned nose. "Do you expect us to swallow such liberal nonsense."

"No" I said, "I expect you to wait there while I FIREMALAZER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I stick out my hand a blast of white light shot from my palm and soared towards the group. All they had time to do was widen their eyes to the size of saucers before being obliterated by my blast, leaving nothing but a pile of ash in its aftermath."

I guess he heard the blast because Barack came running back with the bodyguard. "Whoa. What happened here?"

"Nothing" I said, "Just showed them my lazer."

Barack and the guard put thier fists on their sides and laughed. "OH FRED!"

A good time was had by all. I stepped out of the White House, where I spread my arms to fly back to my mansion in my private island off the coast, to be with my wife Thadie Newton.

VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
tallboy___66:
Eh I changed it back to me.
Mar 11, 2010
_moonbeam_:
keeper jobs...

That might help
Mar 12, 2010

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