I have been thinking about pauses a lot lately, and namely what they mean to me, and how I use them.
What does it mean to pause?
Is it defined simply by taking a moment?
Does it have to be a moment of rest?
Or is it merely a function on a video game that allows us to walk away from an adventure? In my favorite sitcom, How I Met Your Mother, the characters Marshall and Lily have an agreement that they can pause in the middle of any argument and I think that is brilliant. It allows them to get outside the moment, because as any of us know, it is rather easy to get lost in a moment like that. In many arguments we get caught up, our blood pressure rises, and soon it has taken on a life of it’s own. It is in those moments that a pause makes the most sense.
I think we all need to pause more often, not just to take us out of a situation that could blow up in our faces, but also to appreciate that which is around us. All too often we get bogged down by our jobs, our surroundings, or by life itself, and it is then that we need to pause more than ever. Just stop what you are doing right in that moment, unless you are driving of course, always keep driving.
That is how I pause, when I remember to. If it is not going to be detrimental, I just stop what I am doing and really look at the moment. It can be the way the sun is setting as you prepare to move a locomotive at work, or taking in the group dynamic when you are with friends. Whatever is going on in that moment, I will guarantee you will feel better about everything else, and you will appreciate what is going on even more.
Last week I received a couple packages in the mail from a friend of mine up north, I didn’t know what I would find within them, but we had agreed to exchange Christmas presents, so I eagerly opened them up. The big surprise was a personalized journal, the leather cover was decorated and included a message from my friend. I was floored by how awesome it was, and ran to twitter to thank her for such a great gift. I was truly thankful and rather touched by the gift, but it wasn’t until later, when I paused, that it dawned on me just how much it meant.
Here was a gift from someone that I consider to be a true friend, but there was so much more to it. It told a story of sorts, and that story made me smile. This gift showed how well she knows me, and the thought that went into buying it for me. This journal reflected a history, as well as a moment, and that placed so much importance on it. It was then that I started to think of how I could use this journal, it couldn’t just be random rants and bitch fests to clear my head, no this one needed to be more. I looked at the journal for a minute or two, and when my head hit my pillow, my smile was that much larger than before.
As it nears midnight here on New Years Eve, I pause again. I pause to look back on a year that had adventure, love, friendship, excitement, and the inevitable disappointments. The last month or so has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster but the positive has always outweighed the negative, so I move forward with that smile on my face, and the occasional smirk for good measure.
I usually scoff at the people that are vocal about the New Year being a grand change of things, not because I try to be pessimistic, but because it is just another day in the larger scheme of things. This year I feel differently about it, I know that it won’t actually “feel” different, but the idea of a clean slate is one that I am looking at with a bit of interest. I have a feeling about 2014, I feel that it will be a very good year for me. I have a couple vacations planned, I will get to see on of my favorite authors give a reading, my student loans will be paid off, and the future is bright.
I have things to work on within myself, and in my life, and I welcome the challenge of it all.
I have people I look forward to seeing, and cities that I look forward to exploring.
I can feel the creativity within me showing me the way to address it.
My determination is growing, and maybe it is stubbornness, but it will help me with the changes that need to be made.
The new year may just be another day in the scheme of things, but all we ever need is another day.
You didn’t get something done today that you needed to, pause and figure out how to do it.
You messed up and are unsure of the ramifications, pause and figure out how to fix it.
You lazed about when you could have accomplished something, pause and realize sometimes you need to relax.
The world is a great big place, pause and notice how big you can be within it.
Happy New Year to all you friends, family, and random people that read these words I put down.
Thank you for being here, I wish you a wonderful 2014 full of wonder