thafckisup

honestly, i really fucking hate valentines day. I mean with a passion. I want it to burn on a cross, I really hate it. Maybe its because I've never had a good experience with the damn holiday, or when I have, it gets screwed over the next day, following week, etc. I cant wait till this damn month is over with. I had my jeopardy tryouts yesterday. It didnt go so well. Out of the 60 people there only 4 made it. Which kinda makes me feel ok and that I am not stupid or anything, but either way I will try again next year.
I hate valentines day, did I say that already.
I have so many thoughts on my mind I dont know where to begin. People are pissing me off, mostly because it feels like they want me to change the way I am so they will feel better, or to make them happy.....not gonna happen. Kevin Is gonna be kevin till the day he dies, and I will not be anyone else.


Im so fucking out of it.
Lata

heres anotha poem lemme know what u think

Sometimes I wonder where my fear comes from
Was it so bad before
Is that what hold me back
Fear can drive you insane
Fear can cause you pain
Fear can make your whole life inane
How do you fight it?
What can one do?
Should they come right out and face it head on?
should they leave it and move on?
Can it be defeated?
Can you triumph over it?
I wonder myself sometimes
All my life there is one fear I have had
I have never once confronted it when It meant the most.
I have never fought it when the battle knowingly could be won.
Am I to look back pondering what i could have done.
its stuff like this that really confuses me
And sends my emotions in a twirl.
You want something to be but it never does
Fear holds you back
Fear will destroy what you want
And what you want to give
So many things must be said
So much should be exposed
Must defeat the fear
For it stops me everyday
From saying what maybe already to late to say.