Im the kinda girl that hangs with the guys
Like a fly on the wall with my secret eyes
Takin it in, try to be feminine
With my makeup bag watchin all the sin
Misfit, I sit; Lit up, wicked
-No Doubt, Hey Baby
Im John Roberts dirty little secret. Yes folks, you heard it here first. Look for me at the confirmation hearings: Ill be the one with the riding crop and the Polaroid camera.
Today was the first day of school, and after I got over the initial shock of the revised early start time, I had a pretty good day. Im already in love with my kids, and I think they are learning to tolerate me. Example from my junior English class:
ME: Alrighty, the first thing were going to do is put you in a seating chart.
COOL KID: Oh, man, assigned seating sucks!
ME: You obviously havent experienced MY assigned seating. Its quite enlightening.
COOL KID: Yeah whatever.
ME: Hey, man, just see how the experience affects you. Dont judge it until you try it.
(arranges seats; COOL KID is moved only one desk forward)
ME: See? Big difference, right?
COOL KID: (playing along) Yeah, I see it now. Im feeling it.
ME: Feeling the flow of the good karma, right?
COOL KID: Yah, Im all over it.
Ha. Score one for the dorky teacher there.
I also had a run-in with John in the hallway. I was walking in the hallway before one of my classes with a giant stack of photocopied packets; he was standing aloofly with the student teacher who follows him around like a lost puppy. The pile in my arms got too heavy, and some of the papers slipped off the pile and onto the floor. John made no move to help me but just smiled like a smarmy ass.
Around the corner came a student I have never seen before. John asked him, Hey, what are you doing out of class? and the kid replied, I was kicked out. John said, Kicked out on the first day?! Whats the matter with you?! But the student ignored him and went right over to me. Do you need some help? he asked me. I said, Yes, I do. Thank you. He helped me pick up the copies, stacked all of the papers into his arms, and carried the pile back to my room for me. I really appreciate this. Do you need a pass somewhere? I asked the student. Nah, s alright. Im cool. he said, and went on his way. What a good kid. And his act of good will made John look like an ass too, since he stood there, watching me struggle, while a complete stranger, a child no less, came to my aid.
Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glennnnnnnnnnnnnn...!
Glen's the man
Goin' to work.
Got his tie, got ambition.
Middle management is right in his grasp.
It's a dream he will never let die.
Glen's the--
man of the hour, he's the king of his cube!
Status Quo reports have finally met their rival. Burning the--
candle at both ends on his way to the top,
He knows one day he just could become...
Supervisor!
Roy!
Roy, Roy Roy! . . .
If anyone can find me a link to a feed of this Starbucks commercial from a few years ago, I will be eternally grateful. It features the 80s band Survivor following Glen as he makes his way to cubicle hell and singing their own warped version of Eye of the Tiger. Too funny to be shelved in the archive closet.
On the social note, Ive been invited to yet ANOTHER sex toy party; this one I plan to attend, if only to appease my friends, who are obviously trying to tell me something.
LOL!
Mmmm meat.
Like a fly on the wall with my secret eyes
Takin it in, try to be feminine
With my makeup bag watchin all the sin
Misfit, I sit; Lit up, wicked
-No Doubt, Hey Baby
Im John Roberts dirty little secret. Yes folks, you heard it here first. Look for me at the confirmation hearings: Ill be the one with the riding crop and the Polaroid camera.
Today was the first day of school, and after I got over the initial shock of the revised early start time, I had a pretty good day. Im already in love with my kids, and I think they are learning to tolerate me. Example from my junior English class:
ME: Alrighty, the first thing were going to do is put you in a seating chart.
COOL KID: Oh, man, assigned seating sucks!
ME: You obviously havent experienced MY assigned seating. Its quite enlightening.
COOL KID: Yeah whatever.
ME: Hey, man, just see how the experience affects you. Dont judge it until you try it.
(arranges seats; COOL KID is moved only one desk forward)
ME: See? Big difference, right?
COOL KID: (playing along) Yeah, I see it now. Im feeling it.
ME: Feeling the flow of the good karma, right?
COOL KID: Yah, Im all over it.
Ha. Score one for the dorky teacher there.
I also had a run-in with John in the hallway. I was walking in the hallway before one of my classes with a giant stack of photocopied packets; he was standing aloofly with the student teacher who follows him around like a lost puppy. The pile in my arms got too heavy, and some of the papers slipped off the pile and onto the floor. John made no move to help me but just smiled like a smarmy ass.
Around the corner came a student I have never seen before. John asked him, Hey, what are you doing out of class? and the kid replied, I was kicked out. John said, Kicked out on the first day?! Whats the matter with you?! But the student ignored him and went right over to me. Do you need some help? he asked me. I said, Yes, I do. Thank you. He helped me pick up the copies, stacked all of the papers into his arms, and carried the pile back to my room for me. I really appreciate this. Do you need a pass somewhere? I asked the student. Nah, s alright. Im cool. he said, and went on his way. What a good kid. And his act of good will made John look like an ass too, since he stood there, watching me struggle, while a complete stranger, a child no less, came to my aid.
Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glen!
Glen, Glen, Glennnnnnnnnnnnnn...!
Glen's the man
Goin' to work.
Got his tie, got ambition.
Middle management is right in his grasp.
It's a dream he will never let die.
Glen's the--
man of the hour, he's the king of his cube!
Status Quo reports have finally met their rival. Burning the--
candle at both ends on his way to the top,
He knows one day he just could become...
Supervisor!
Roy!
Roy, Roy Roy! . . .
If anyone can find me a link to a feed of this Starbucks commercial from a few years ago, I will be eternally grateful. It features the 80s band Survivor following Glen as he makes his way to cubicle hell and singing their own warped version of Eye of the Tiger. Too funny to be shelved in the archive closet.
On the social note, Ive been invited to yet ANOTHER sex toy party; this one I plan to attend, if only to appease my friends, who are obviously trying to tell me something.
LOL!
Mmmm meat.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
Man...wish I got invites to sex toy parties...on the other hand, since my most of my friends around here are guys, maybe it's a blessing that I don't get invited. Oof.