telepathboy

Through the winter months, my spirituality wanes. Partially because I suffer from the "Seasonal Affective Disorder" as much as almost everyone else I know. But partially because it's too damn cold to find an area of the world to tune in with.

I found myself staring in awe at the moon yesterday morning as I was driving through the huge river valley I pass at 70mph on my way to work. It as huge, beautifully gleaming as it rose above the silhouetted treeline in the hills. It was below freezing, without a cloud in the sky, so the air had the crisp feel that seems to bring everything in the world to your vision with an unbridled clarity. I saw it, and I wanted to cry... because it was the first time in months that I had noticed it.

It was the most spiritual I had felt in months... but it was also the point where I realized how spiritually crippled I had become recently. My spirit had atrophied, and this was the first day that I noticed. Dawn on a funeral day.

I'm leaving my house tonight... and walking down to the park about half a mile away. I'm going to find a spot to sit, alone, in the cold... and try to speak with the part of myself that I have been hiding from. Or has been hiding from me. Or maybe I've just been too caught in up in material reality. At any rate... I need to get back in touch.