teethofthehydra

Hey hey... I just got back from Chuck Palahniuk's book signing for Haunted which was pretty fucking cool. I guess this is the book that he's been touring with that's making people everywhere throw up and faint when he reads... no one seemed to lose their shit during this reading, but a bunch of people did leave, looking disgusted. I, however, was thoroughly amused. He threw plastic severed limbs into the audience and distributed some air fresheners that smelled like meat before he read the story called "Hot Potting" (I think that's what it's called?) which is basically about people boiled alive in geothermic hot springs. So that was gross and wonderful. I was the second to last person whose book he signed, tho' I tried really hard to convince the guy after me to go first so I could all be like, hey, I'm the last person of your night, so why don't you take me home and fuck me, you sexily twisted man? The last-in-line-guy wasn't up for switching places because he wanted all the glory, and when push comes to shove I'm not ballsy enough to say anything like that anyway.

While waiting to get my book signed I was browsing the SG book and decdided that I want to model for this site (I've been toying with the idea for some time, and the book is really very awesome) but I don't have enough flattering full-body pictures of me to attach to an application... I need to find a friend with a digicam willing to take sexy pictures of me... frankly I see no reason why I wouldn't be accepted (says ToTH, vainly) except that I could stand to lose 5 pounds. Don't get me wrong, I'm not fat, and I'm not one of those girls who bitches about being fat or who thinks she's fat... although I am extraordinarily heavy for my height because I'm very muscular and considerably strong for a girl... tho' not toned, and it's that 5-pound layer of flab that covers all the muscles that prevents me from being quinessentially hot. That and not so much tits. Got the ass though. I straight have that shit covered.

I miss my boy but can't bring myself to call him on acct. of I hate the phone and usually only call him to make plans and since I'm not there it seems pointless, I'm so bad at idle chatter, and I still refuse to give in and call him just to say I miss him. I don't know why. Probably because I'm an asshole. Definitely because I'm scared of emotional openness. Funny, considering that I publicize all this shit on the web in a way that like, anyone could access... I don't mark my journal as private, even... but there's something about the illusion of anonymity that makes talking about my feelings okay.

My cat has her face buried in a sneaker, and it's just about the cutest thing in the whole world. A minute ago she was attacking a cork as though it was the enemy, all kicking it with her back feet like how cats do. I call her my cat even though she's very much my parents' cat now. She's so spoiled. I took the best pic of me hugging her and mashing her all into the table on accident. She tolerates nonsense like that because she's perfect.

I'm so flattered by how many people commented on my last entry... I feel all kinds of popular. Here is some information everyone might like to know (if you don't care you may stop reading here):

I am coming back to FL next week. I have lived in FL for about 3.5 years now, on and off. In between my time spent in Key West (which is very much home to me) and Sarasota (where I live now during the school year), I spent some time on a commune in Hawaii, did one semester of school in North Carolina at UNC-Asheville, moved back in with my folks here in Queens for a month, and hitchhiked cross-country last summer over the course of like 10 weeks. Yeah, I hitchhiked because I'm a badass. I'm happy to be a gyspsy again this summer and even happier to own a reliable automobile. Nonetheless I'll be spending most of my summer in Key West waitressing and dancing (for love and for money, respectively) but hope to go to the Grand Canyon with the girl of my dreams in late July, road trip wooooo.

The term Suicide Girls is taken from a Chuck Palahniuk book by the way, which maybe you know and I certainly should have but didn't before tonight. Just a little info to round out the story. Goodnight and kisses lovely people.