teela

thank you all of you who helped with my questionnaire, and sorry again for being rubbish at maintaining a presence online. the last fortnight has seen me get a numb leg from sitting at the computer too long [seeing doctor today about it], start taking ephedrine to deal with fatigue so i could get essays done [to my american friends, it's pretty hard to get hold of here and i definitely didn't have a prescription ], overdose on ephedrine because i was freaking out then got too hot and started projectile vomiting blood while sweat poured out of my face to puddle on the floor, and put on weight while not even eating.

it's been, on average, pretty shit. but now i intend to make a lot more effort on here as i'm almost free for the summer - just a couple of exams still to go!

i got in touch with one of my old friends off here through bloody iSpace so it turns out it is good for something! i'm really happy about seeing him again, he taught me about London so much and now i walk the streets and see imprints of old memories everywhere but he's not been here for so long and now he's back.

i suppose it ties in with a feeling i've been having incresingly of late that i just don't want to get any older - i don't want to even be 22! everything is so different to when i was 17, and in many ways i miss it. i'm a lot happier now and a lot more in control, and i like myself a lot more now - all reasons why i'm excited about seeing aforementioned old friend again, i want to see if he thinks i've changed! but there's something about the social expectations people have, the way i'm supposed to be and the way i'm perceived now that just doesn't sit right with me. too much, too young!

on that note i also found an old school friend on iSpace who is now a proud father! we dated briefly as well. strange the way life pans out...

right, now to go hand in the last of my essays and make the most of my last day of sunshine before the inevitable ephedrine crash! xx