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teege

Chicago

Member Since 2006

Followers 87 Following 106

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Wednesday Aug 23, 2006

Aug 23, 2006
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Take the dobermans bowling. Take them bowling.

When's the last time you saw a doberman? Think about it. They used to be the shit. Chances are, you haven't seen one in a while. But that all changed last night for the customers at a local bowling alley, thanks to me. I took the dobermans bowling. Took them bowling.

Inspired by the movie "The Doberman Gang" in which a man trains a group of dobermans to be jewel theives, I went around the city buying up as many dobermans as I could, eventually ending up with 14 dobermans. The goal: To take the dobermans bowling. Take them bowling. So, that's just what I did and let me tell you, it was a total cluster fuck.

I never would have guesed what a terrible idea this was. Most of the dobermans didn't even bowl. We weren't even there 5 minutes before they started mauling the shit out of people, climbing on the snack bar, and horsing around in the bathroom. I was up getting them shoes when someone tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Hey, pal. Your dobermans are mauling the shit out of people. AND they're bowling without regulation shoes." Well the shoes I was taking care of. How could I help it if some of them wanted to get started? They're dobermans. Deal with it. The mauling was a different story. How embarrasing. I didn't know what to do, so I snuck out. I heard later that one of the dobermans almost bowled a perfect game but during the last frame one of the other dobermans mauled the shit out of him.

Oh well. I guess that's why you don't see dobermans much anymore.

Never take the dobermans bowling. Never take them bowling.

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