Well then I do think that any hour is a good time to document thoughts. Not exactly stream of consciousness in this case but what the fuck does that matter? I wonder?
So it is 2008 now as it has been for the last 22 days or so, making this a 15 year constant headache that I have had. The intensity of the pain changes as does the part of my head that aches. Currently my eyes feeling like they are being forced out of the orbital socket, not the most pleasing sensation I do admit but what can be done?
Now I have only started this entry and I can tell already that I am going to end up painting this picture of myself that will make me out to be a bitchy bitch type of guy, and a real asshole as well, but hey now I am okay with that, because it is not entirely inaccurate; pretty spot on I will say.
And my temples are beginning to throb and a sharp pain is developing at the right base of my neck, must be near the axis, it feels high enough to be up there. Add that to the list. Yes that would be correct, I just did.
Well in recent local events a corpse was found on the roadside, apparently stuck twice by vehicles. Or so this is what the police think at this point. And damn the luck if I did not know the guy, haha and my billiards student did not date him. This brings me to the next point or thing I want to touch or bitch about. Whatever you like to think of it as, I am only passing this information about; naturally you are expected to create your own opinions, regardless of how inaccurate or flat out wrong they may turn out to be. Well not to get too far off topic, this death shocked so many people, I am not included in this group. Quoting Marilyn Manson "The death of one is a tragedy; the death of a million is just a statistic." Apparently it is natural that they will be so surprised. I will speculate it has something to do with them caring about human life. And I find myself straying from my point again, so the point is, I am quite fed up with people using these events they feel to be "tragedies" as tools to grab attention. Honestly if you are so determined to cry stay the fuck home or go pay a therapist to listen to your bullshit. This shit happens several times every year. And it goes back as far as I do remember. One year in high school there were 3 classmates killed in a car accident. I went unaffected as I have through the lot of these deaths; never once using it as something to beg for attention with. I have known many people that have died in unnatural ways. I have accepted that this is one of our two certainties in life, the most certain of the two. Pain and death I mean. It sickens me that the deceased are always everyone's "best friend" or like a sibling, but only after they have died. Then comes the whining about the matter so that they can have others tell them how sorry they are for their loss. Get the fuck out of here with that bullshit. They care because they want attention, and those giving attention care because they think it is proper to do so. A big fucking joke it all is to me, the entirety of it really.
Everyone is so fucking part time about fucking EVERYTHING!!!! Our county's high school football team has been on a losing streak since my parents were infants. And all these years no one gave a fuck about the team. They have one winning season and the part time fans scurry sideways to the stadium (sandcrabs) and go fucking wild for the team. Now they have t-shirts district champs (they tied) and all manner of merchandise and memorabilia. It is the same for anything really; people care about the winning whatever and always will. You have to win to be recognized and supported. The team lost two games and the fans were leaving before the game was over, going to beat the rush home I'm sure because they knew it was a lost cause. So I really don't give a sandcrabs fucked cunt about the team and I never will. But during that winning season I was the asshole for not supporting them. Fuck your mothers!!
The same is true for other things in life. People do not care about anything until it affects them. Alcoholics anonymous brings in these activists who want you to listen to their sob stories of loved ones lost and lives ruined and forever changed. And they are just so completely against whatever vice brought you to whatever kind of meeting you may be at. But they care only because it has affected them. Surely most Mothers Against Drunk Drivers didn't fucking care before their child was killed or paralyzed. We all know that the majority of them would not be "devoting" so much of their time to "fighting" for their cause if something they feel to be tragic did not happen to them. Of course they are all blind to everything until something happens to make them see it. If you have to be made to care then why waste your time caring at all? Perhaps it is human nature to need a reason to care.
So my vision is getting spotty now, I should probably lay down for a bit. I would do that but my leg is numb and I would rather not get up at the moment. There is also the issue of the dog sleeping in my lap, little bitch will probably bite me for waking her. Hahaha! I will have to do it quickly.
On a lighter note it is a relief that the fucking postal service has gotten back up off of its lazy ass after their little holiday. I am waiting for my tax return bullshit papers so I can see how big of a bite they are taking out of my ass. It is probably my own fault for filling out whatever the fuck wrong on the worksheet they give you when you start work, but oh well. It will cost me until I learn the proper way to sort that mess out. Maybe I should have had children at 15 like the majority of my town so I would have dependants to claim. Fucking hell what was I thinking to not do that? Slap some sense into me someone.
So it is 2008 now as it has been for the last 22 days or so, making this a 15 year constant headache that I have had. The intensity of the pain changes as does the part of my head that aches. Currently my eyes feeling like they are being forced out of the orbital socket, not the most pleasing sensation I do admit but what can be done?
Now I have only started this entry and I can tell already that I am going to end up painting this picture of myself that will make me out to be a bitchy bitch type of guy, and a real asshole as well, but hey now I am okay with that, because it is not entirely inaccurate; pretty spot on I will say.
And my temples are beginning to throb and a sharp pain is developing at the right base of my neck, must be near the axis, it feels high enough to be up there. Add that to the list. Yes that would be correct, I just did.
Well in recent local events a corpse was found on the roadside, apparently stuck twice by vehicles. Or so this is what the police think at this point. And damn the luck if I did not know the guy, haha and my billiards student did not date him. This brings me to the next point or thing I want to touch or bitch about. Whatever you like to think of it as, I am only passing this information about; naturally you are expected to create your own opinions, regardless of how inaccurate or flat out wrong they may turn out to be. Well not to get too far off topic, this death shocked so many people, I am not included in this group. Quoting Marilyn Manson "The death of one is a tragedy; the death of a million is just a statistic." Apparently it is natural that they will be so surprised. I will speculate it has something to do with them caring about human life. And I find myself straying from my point again, so the point is, I am quite fed up with people using these events they feel to be "tragedies" as tools to grab attention. Honestly if you are so determined to cry stay the fuck home or go pay a therapist to listen to your bullshit. This shit happens several times every year. And it goes back as far as I do remember. One year in high school there were 3 classmates killed in a car accident. I went unaffected as I have through the lot of these deaths; never once using it as something to beg for attention with. I have known many people that have died in unnatural ways. I have accepted that this is one of our two certainties in life, the most certain of the two. Pain and death I mean. It sickens me that the deceased are always everyone's "best friend" or like a sibling, but only after they have died. Then comes the whining about the matter so that they can have others tell them how sorry they are for their loss. Get the fuck out of here with that bullshit. They care because they want attention, and those giving attention care because they think it is proper to do so. A big fucking joke it all is to me, the entirety of it really.
Everyone is so fucking part time about fucking EVERYTHING!!!! Our county's high school football team has been on a losing streak since my parents were infants. And all these years no one gave a fuck about the team. They have one winning season and the part time fans scurry sideways to the stadium (sandcrabs) and go fucking wild for the team. Now they have t-shirts district champs (they tied) and all manner of merchandise and memorabilia. It is the same for anything really; people care about the winning whatever and always will. You have to win to be recognized and supported. The team lost two games and the fans were leaving before the game was over, going to beat the rush home I'm sure because they knew it was a lost cause. So I really don't give a sandcrabs fucked cunt about the team and I never will. But during that winning season I was the asshole for not supporting them. Fuck your mothers!!
The same is true for other things in life. People do not care about anything until it affects them. Alcoholics anonymous brings in these activists who want you to listen to their sob stories of loved ones lost and lives ruined and forever changed. And they are just so completely against whatever vice brought you to whatever kind of meeting you may be at. But they care only because it has affected them. Surely most Mothers Against Drunk Drivers didn't fucking care before their child was killed or paralyzed. We all know that the majority of them would not be "devoting" so much of their time to "fighting" for their cause if something they feel to be tragic did not happen to them. Of course they are all blind to everything until something happens to make them see it. If you have to be made to care then why waste your time caring at all? Perhaps it is human nature to need a reason to care.
So my vision is getting spotty now, I should probably lay down for a bit. I would do that but my leg is numb and I would rather not get up at the moment. There is also the issue of the dog sleeping in my lap, little bitch will probably bite me for waking her. Hahaha! I will have to do it quickly.
On a lighter note it is a relief that the fucking postal service has gotten back up off of its lazy ass after their little holiday. I am waiting for my tax return bullshit papers so I can see how big of a bite they are taking out of my ass. It is probably my own fault for filling out whatever the fuck wrong on the worksheet they give you when you start work, but oh well. It will cost me until I learn the proper way to sort that mess out. Maybe I should have had children at 15 like the majority of my town so I would have dependants to claim. Fucking hell what was I thinking to not do that? Slap some sense into me someone.
hehe i like the postcard idea thats cool, i dont think ther are postcards of my town, well there must be, i think i might go and have a look for some next time i have a chance
x