tally

so many thoughts running through my mind.....i wonder and ponder too much, way too much; that's probably why i can't sleep at night. actually i think my sleeping problem still stems from basic training, but of late a good part of it is that i've so much to do and to worry about that these thoughts are what is keeping me awake at night. plus the fact that i am in texas and i live in barracks that do not have ac, and the other habitants are rude and obnoxious. anyhoo, only 3 more nights in this hell hole and i will be moving off post in to my own place. i can't believe on friday i will be a home owner. that's right i bought a two bedroom two bath with a fireplace and a garage. today i did most of the "fun" stuff like turing on the electric, cable and phone ( the phoneline is strictly for my computer and i know i shouldn't get cable, but i am so lonely here that i think i "need" it....maybe i'll set tv hour restrictions for myself. once i get my office all set up i want to set aside 30 mins to an hour every day to just write random things; a freewrite so to say. i need to brush up on my skills; i've just not used them in a while, not even to journal. i also need to read more, even though i nearly to read every night which is about a novel a week. the only thing about moving off post is that i must arise at 445 every morning and leave my house no later than 500 to make 615 formation for pt because the gates are backed-the-hell up with people with the same mission in mind. so tonight i went to target and i bought some pretty purple glasses to match my dishes, contemporary with purple, blue and pink flowers ( i know so girly) and suddenly the lady was asking me where "do you keep the detergent?" and i'm thinking to myself, "currently under the sink", then i realize she thinks i work there and i promptly tell her that i don't and she apologizes and gets all embarrassed. my next adventure at target was running into the girl that looked just like jadonn, i nearly killed myself trying to get another look at her, all the while i was asking myself, "what would jadonn be doing in texas?", and i concluded sadly with a wildly thumping heart that indeed it was not jadonn. grrrrrrrrrrrr, it's been years and i think a part of me is still in love with her. to this day i still have no idea what went wrong, but apparently something did. it's not fair that i will always desire and love something i can never have, but i suppose it'll make me stronger since it hasn't killed me, though it (SHE) nearly did. well, i suppose that's all for now. i need to retrieve my laundry from the dryer, 3 washers and 3 dryers for 60 people.....WHAT THE FUCK???? i've been waiting for days to do laundry....soon though i'll have my own personal washer and dryer, yah!!!!
well take care all and goodnight