Ode to Mountain Dew
You are so yellow or kind of green and when I find you in a can say at a gas station or a convenience store there are few things that can make happier.
When I need a rush of flavor, taste and extreme caffeine, you step on the scene with your yellow and kind of green and make my whole body...
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You are so yellow or kind of green and when I find you in a can say at a gas station or a convenience store there are few things that can make happier.
When I need a rush of flavor, taste and extreme caffeine, you step on the scene with your yellow and kind of green and make my whole body...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
hi.
i have no poems or wordplay today. just throwing a little piece of myself out there to the world. just chattin' and shit.
i think i might be getting kind of lonely.
before i could just say that word, lonely. or think it, but now i can feel it. it's good to feel your feelings. only sometimes you remember why you made yourself stop...
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i have no poems or wordplay today. just throwing a little piece of myself out there to the world. just chattin' and shit.
i think i might be getting kind of lonely.
before i could just say that word, lonely. or think it, but now i can feel it. it's good to feel your feelings. only sometimes you remember why you made yourself stop...
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kulmagrrl:
Lonely. That is like the ultimate forbidden word to some people. I'm so lonely in this life of mine, but I always feel too ashamed to admit it. So good for you for admitting it. I'm lonely, too. It sucks, but I'm coming to believe it is a common human condition.
fred:
Hey man thanks for the props
Guess what?
We have the some birthday 10/14. A great day in history.
Hey man thanks for the props
Guess what?
We have the some birthday 10/14. A great day in history.
passing photos of faces to Hate*
pin the tac on Iraq
stab freedom in the back
because calm is not conducive
to military contracts
feed the fear fire
a new stack of 8x10 glossies
toss these black woman gay commie faces aside
we got a new picture of the enemy from which to hide
we got a new face and race
to place our demons...
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pin the tac on Iraq
stab freedom in the back
because calm is not conducive
to military contracts
feed the fear fire
a new stack of 8x10 glossies
toss these black woman gay commie faces aside
we got a new picture of the enemy from which to hide
we got a new face and race
to place our demons...
Read More
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
kulmagrrl:
Amazing. The last stanza took my breath away esp.
candycox:
I love this! Fucking George W. Feces!! haha. You make me laugh. I love that you have such a way with words! Oh the power. Really brightens my day.
xoxo, Kit
xoxo, Kit
finding your hidden self behind the lo-fat milk on the shelf and the hidden bong in the closet
born in the sand (choking) with a smooth hand (stroking) and its all so claustrophobic its all stuck in a room, the broom closet where the bong is kept or better yet hidden when your mom comes over, where the extra blanket is kept for when that...
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born in the sand (choking) with a smooth hand (stroking) and its all so claustrophobic its all stuck in a room, the broom closet where the bong is kept or better yet hidden when your mom comes over, where the extra blanket is kept for when that...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
kaseypoteet:
you rock!!!! 
soph:
i like your words.
rain leaks on the cheek of a stressed out freak over 1,404 Weeks
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, addicted to work week
sick from not quite sure
so its not quite pure what I seek
Thursday high, Friday peak, Saturday- crash
Sunday- rest and rebuild the mask
thrive on stress but hide and despise its effects
kind of a wreck but I pay the rent
and got...
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Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, addicted to work week
sick from not quite sure
so its not quite pure what I seek
Thursday high, Friday peak, Saturday- crash
Sunday- rest and rebuild the mask
thrive on stress but hide and despise its effects
kind of a wreck but I pay the rent
and got...
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first date poetry assignment with blatant sexual overtones
When was the last time you chewed up your mind and spit it out to me or this paper fresh? Let the blank page possibilities suck your rage and make you wet with wonder at what you ever did to be stuck in a room with us. Fuck desire. Desire is easy, be wet with wonder, know...
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When was the last time you chewed up your mind and spit it out to me or this paper fresh? Let the blank page possibilities suck your rage and make you wet with wonder at what you ever did to be stuck in a room with us. Fuck desire. Desire is easy, be wet with wonder, know...
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candycox:
> I used to be a cutter. I have a very strange, morbid fascination with pain. I like the way my skin feels when it's being cut. I don't really understand why I like it so much... I don't do it anymore, but I still think about it every now and then. I used to get cravings to do it even. I know, I'm a complete freak.
> I've done things while rolling on e that I never would have thought I'd do - I've gotten completely naked and danced all alone around a complete stranger's house to music, I've had sex with a guy and my roommate at the same time, and I danced around an empty apartment while hallucinating vibrant, moving shapes on friends' faces.
> The only time I was serious about committing suicide was when I was once having a bad BAD comedown from e. I got soooo fucking depressed that I tried killing myself with pills. This was also the time I started cutting myself. Thank god I got thru that.
> The misdemeanor I have on my record is from shoplifting. Yes, I'm a fucking shoplifter. My "habit" got out of control for a little while til I got caught at fucking Target for trying to steal $130 worth of shit (DVDs, cosmetics, books, underwear...). I have to pay around $1000 in fines over the next year and I'm banned from fucking Target. haha. I'm a retard.
> I STILL shoplift. I can't fucking stop. I have a very addictive personality. It sucks cuz as much as I want to stop, I uh, well, can't. As weird as that sounds.
> I've been on Lexapro for depression for months now and I just stopped therapy after 6 months straight. I may not look like it, but I am fucked up.
> I like reading the endings to books before I finish reading them, so if I die, I'll know how it ended.
How's that for a dark side?
[Edited on Aug 22, 2005 11:06PM]
> I've done things while rolling on e that I never would have thought I'd do - I've gotten completely naked and danced all alone around a complete stranger's house to music, I've had sex with a guy and my roommate at the same time, and I danced around an empty apartment while hallucinating vibrant, moving shapes on friends' faces.
> The only time I was serious about committing suicide was when I was once having a bad BAD comedown from e. I got soooo fucking depressed that I tried killing myself with pills. This was also the time I started cutting myself. Thank god I got thru that.
> The misdemeanor I have on my record is from shoplifting. Yes, I'm a fucking shoplifter. My "habit" got out of control for a little while til I got caught at fucking Target for trying to steal $130 worth of shit (DVDs, cosmetics, books, underwear...). I have to pay around $1000 in fines over the next year and I'm banned from fucking Target. haha. I'm a retard.
> I STILL shoplift. I can't fucking stop. I have a very addictive personality. It sucks cuz as much as I want to stop, I uh, well, can't. As weird as that sounds.
> I've been on Lexapro for depression for months now and I just stopped therapy after 6 months straight. I may not look like it, but I am fucked up.
> I like reading the endings to books before I finish reading them, so if I die, I'll know how it ended.
How's that for a dark side?
[Edited on Aug 22, 2005 11:06PM]
update and relate all of the days little bits of this and that into a three minute chat of how's this going and how can i be clever but never knowing the smooth lines in the face behind the face that's pasted in the corner
can i take your order and place my soul somewhere farther from the border fence its too intense on my...
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work was hard and stressful but still kind of fun in a sick way... i am watching a lot of simpsons recently. that may seem trivial, but i usually watch a lot of simpsons during certain phases, i think when i'm depressed or coming out of a depression...i have not had a cigarette/clove in over 48 hours.
update: aug 10
still no smokes. i might...
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update: aug 10
still no smokes. i might...
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candycox:
I'm an ex-TV junkie... TV = bad!! My roommate and I don't even have it anymore... we just watch movies now. TV sucks anyways...
Good luck trying to quit smoking - hard to do from what I hear. I smoke occassionally (usually when drunk), but I never really got into it. Good for you though - smoking is a nasty habit.
xoxo, CC
[Edited on Aug 11, 2005 2:06PM]
Good luck trying to quit smoking - hard to do from what I hear. I smoke occassionally (usually when drunk), but I never really got into it. Good for you though - smoking is a nasty habit.
xoxo, CC
[Edited on Aug 11, 2005 2:06PM]
candycox:
hey don't ever apologize for a "long" comment. I like hearing from you, and I understand what you mean. Just as you can't understand how some people only occasionally smoke, I personally never understand how people get addicted to cigarettes... obviously people get stuck physically, but I don't enjoy cigarettes enough to constantly be smoking them. They taste bad, they smell bad, they do nasty shit to you... I don't get a real high off of them.
But for some reason I find people who smoke cigarettes very attractive... and they do relax me when I'm particularly stressed. That's why I usually only smoke when I drink... plus, I like the whole "process" or act of smoking. It's calming.
Anyways, I'm rambling cuz I'm high. I don't even know if I'm making sense, I'm that fucked up. Why the fuck am I on SG when I'm this fucked up?? Cuz this site is addictive to me like crack. This is my weakness... haha.
Sigh. It's times like this that I wish I actually knew you and not just the "internet" you. A lot of people I've met on here are so cool, but I don't really know them, you know? I've only met one person off of this site.
As for weed, I always say that I'm gonna give it up one day... but I never really do. It makes me feel too damn good. I don't feel guilty about it at all.
by the way, what's your real name?
my name's Kit.
[Edited on Aug 11, 2005 10:26PM]
But for some reason I find people who smoke cigarettes very attractive... and they do relax me when I'm particularly stressed. That's why I usually only smoke when I drink... plus, I like the whole "process" or act of smoking. It's calming.
Anyways, I'm rambling cuz I'm high. I don't even know if I'm making sense, I'm that fucked up. Why the fuck am I on SG when I'm this fucked up?? Cuz this site is addictive to me like crack. This is my weakness... haha.
Sigh. It's times like this that I wish I actually knew you and not just the "internet" you. A lot of people I've met on here are so cool, but I don't really know them, you know? I've only met one person off of this site.
As for weed, I always say that I'm gonna give it up one day... but I never really do. It makes me feel too damn good. I don't feel guilty about it at all.
by the way, what's your real name?
my name's Kit.
[Edited on Aug 11, 2005 10:26PM]
8/1/05
(edited)
exclusive suicide do or die flow to get to that elusive place that i don't like to go
my bike is broken but the path is clear and i've never liked math but somehow the numbers are coming to me one by one as the
numbness of yesterday's weed smoke leaves me
one THC fleeing fat cell at a time
it's a hell...
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(edited)
exclusive suicide do or die flow to get to that elusive place that i don't like to go
my bike is broken but the path is clear and i've never liked math but somehow the numbers are coming to me one by one as the
numbness of yesterday's weed smoke leaves me
one THC fleeing fat cell at a time
it's a hell...
Read More
randomrockstar:
Are you very sad?
automatic:
I have one of his old solo albums- aside from hemispheres and circle- it's called "slow death" it sucks ass... but maybe I'll give 'ha' a spin...
7/31/05
exlusive suicide journal flow to get to that elusive place that i don't like to go
my bike is broken but the path is clear and i've never liked math but somehow the numbers are coming to me one by one as the numbness of yesterday's weed smoke leaves me
one THC fleeing fat cell at a time
it's a hell of a mind...
Read More
exlusive suicide journal flow to get to that elusive place that i don't like to go
my bike is broken but the path is clear and i've never liked math but somehow the numbers are coming to me one by one as the numbness of yesterday's weed smoke leaves me
one THC fleeing fat cell at a time
it's a hell of a mind...
Read More
candycox:
Yea for weed. That's all I will say.
xoxo, CC
xoxo, CC
BIGGER, SMARTER, FASTER (DUMBER)
holy fearless fucking/ ive got/ no cable, but still something in my TV is sucking the/ life out of me/ no way this dreary now is it/ Holy cow, Holy shit/ not gonna have a baby or score me a wife to raise the/ soul defecit up/ hesitant to wait for heaven sent when present rent is occupying at least half...
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holy fearless fucking/ ive got/ no cable, but still something in my TV is sucking the/ life out of me/ no way this dreary now is it/ Holy cow, Holy shit/ not gonna have a baby or score me a wife to raise the/ soul defecit up/ hesitant to wait for heaven sent when present rent is occupying at least half...
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automatic:
Nice enough... I too have no cable... But, I only ever watch the "Price Is Right"
do you ever have one of those days where you start off as one person and end up as someone completely different? it's been happening a little to often to me lately and i don't think i like it. i'm supposed to be on this search for accepting the middle road and all that is balanced within myself, but my brain and heart are either...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
mayhemkitty:
It's called bipolar. 
candycox:
I've been in therapy for months now, and all I can say is, pills are my friend! Lately I've been kinda depressed (I've always been such an emotional rollercoaster), but I'm getting thru it. I just feel like my best friends have abandoned me lately and I'm totally resenting my roommate and her mooching, glued-to-her-hip bf. I've lost faith in some people I thought were friends, and am so stressed out with only having a month to find a new apartment, a new roommate, a new job, etc. I have way too fucking much on my plate right now. It's so overwhelming that I've just broken down and cried within the last few days. I'm doing better now, but I feel empty and lost. It's not myself that I'm unhappy with, it's just the state of my life at the moment. 
How are you doing lately?
I've personally been doing shitty... guy drama (as usual, that's nothing new), financial troubles, loneliness...
Hope you're doing ok.
xoxo