synflower

well, its been quite some time since I've given an update.

First, I want to thank all of you that left me comments. I can't tell you how wonderful it was to log on and to see so many familar and unfamilar faces giving their concern and support.

Its now been just over 11 1/2 weeks since my dad had his brain hemmorrhage. And, he's still in the hospital.

It has been an incredibly rocky road plagued with a lot of fear, hope and far too many close calls than I care to talk about.

After almost three weeks in a coma that they never thought he'd awake from, he beat the odds...he started to respond. It was wonderful. he was smiling and laughing. And although the tracheotomy they gave him in week 2 prevented him from making sound, he was trying to talk. I'll never forget one of the most moving moments as I leaned over his bed fighting back tears....he raised a shakey arm and began to rub my shoulder as if to tell me that it was going to be okay. Those are moments that we cherish. And it was then that we learned just how much something as simple as a smile or a squeeze of the hand could be filled with such indescribable hope.

After a few days of wonderful response, something happened...

Since he was doing so well, they felt it was finally time to remove the drainage tube from his head (an external tube inserted into his brain had been draining blood and fluid from his head since the hemmorhage to relieve pressure and save his life). But when they removed it, something awful happened...within hours he was sick. very sick. He had an infection that was threatening to take his life. After many tests, they told us he had Meningitis.

His battle with Meningitis raged for weeks and we almost lost him completely. But, by a miracle, he made it through. Again, defying the odds and surprising the Dr's. However, it rendered him unresponsive again. And for the next few weeks, we slowly watched him become less and less responsive again.

The nuerosurgeon's decided that he needed surgery. That they were not sure how much damage the Meningitis did. Allt hey knew was that it did indeed cause further damage. But in the meantime, he would need three shunts (internal tubes) inserted in his head to permantly drain the fluid away from his brain. Cuz while the infection was gone, there was still massive swelling in his brain.

The surgery was this past Monday. It is now Saturday and he has yet to respond. We had hoped to see something within the first few days after surgery. And to top it off? He now has pnuemonia. THey had to put him back on the ventiallator.

Hopefully the pnuemonia will pass and he will start to breath on his own again. But for now, the nuerosurgeon's can't promise us taht he will ever 'wake up' or respond again. And its just so hard.

We are tryign to keep hopeful and keep our faith. But I'm scared. I just want him back.

As many of you may know, my parents had seperated just over a year ago. And this past Christmas, they annuonced that they were back together. And ths past Feb, they renewed their vows and have been more in love and happier than I have ever seen them. And for this to happen now, just makes it that much more tragic.

Sorry I haven't been in touch more. As you can see, its been a rather traumatic and difficult few weeks. The strength we are finding to get through still amazes me. But I must admit, its getting more and more difficult to be strong.

I'm still at the hospital in Virginia everyday with my mom, holding Dad's hand and encouraging him to come back to us. I've come back to Philly very infrequentyly just to check on things and get more clothes.

So please keep my dad in your thoughts and prayers. And I hope that my next entry can be one much more upbeat.