i live my life with few regrets.
but i can't help but wonder...
what if i never let him get to me? never let him hold me?
it's pathetic. even his drunk phone calls make me happy. and he has no idea.
it's that dreaded predicament. falling for my friend. i don't want to tell him for fear of losing a friend. but not telling him is hurting me more than i ever thought.
and to make this worse, i am not even fuly convinced that i REALLY like him. i could just be fooling myself into thinking i do, all because he notices me and holds me at night when i sleep over. and i want that SO BAD, i could easily just be fooling myself into thinking i like him just so i can have an excuse to feel wanted.
i have no fucking idea what to do. but even with the crazy blizzard outside, i'd drive over to his house in a heartbeat if it meant i could be in his arms for just a minute.
but i can't help but wonder...
what if i never let him get to me? never let him hold me?
it's pathetic. even his drunk phone calls make me happy. and he has no idea.
it's that dreaded predicament. falling for my friend. i don't want to tell him for fear of losing a friend. but not telling him is hurting me more than i ever thought.
and to make this worse, i am not even fuly convinced that i REALLY like him. i could just be fooling myself into thinking i do, all because he notices me and holds me at night when i sleep over. and i want that SO BAD, i could easily just be fooling myself into thinking i like him just so i can have an excuse to feel wanted.
i have no fucking idea what to do. but even with the crazy blizzard outside, i'd drive over to his house in a heartbeat if it meant i could be in his arms for just a minute.
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Hang in there sweetie. Do you know if he likes you? *I'm here for you*