So, my boyfriend and I have talked about last Sunday and we've worked things out.
My boyfriend isn't as sexually aggressive as I am and my approach apparently made him feel dirty in a bad way.
I kinda thought that changing things up might be hot and might lead to more sex because I assumed that maybe the lack of sex was boredom.
But he doesn't want to change anything, which kinda still leaves me with a dilemma...
I still want sex more often. Hes completely comfortable with 1x a week. Ideally Id have sex everyday but I can deal with 3x a week.
Sometimes I feel like he's sabotaging our sex. On weeknights he's always too exhausted (even if I ask him to lay there while I do the work) and then on weekends he hangs out with people and I always fall asleep before they're gone. Sundays have become the most likely but even they don't always work out.
Im too horny for my own good.
My boyfriend isn't as sexually aggressive as I am and my approach apparently made him feel dirty in a bad way.
I kinda thought that changing things up might be hot and might lead to more sex because I assumed that maybe the lack of sex was boredom.
But he doesn't want to change anything, which kinda still leaves me with a dilemma...
I still want sex more often. Hes completely comfortable with 1x a week. Ideally Id have sex everyday but I can deal with 3x a week.
Sometimes I feel like he's sabotaging our sex. On weeknights he's always too exhausted (even if I ask him to lay there while I do the work) and then on weekends he hangs out with people and I always fall asleep before they're gone. Sundays have become the most likely but even they don't always work out.
Im too horny for my own good.
Sexual chemistry is hard to find. On one hand, I had friends in a great relationship, only he was porn addicted and could not climax with her, not even for all the outfits she made and bought, scenarios she set up, and passion she had. My girlfriend tells me that we're the most active among couples she knows (daily). A couple others have good drive (3-5/wk), but then some others see it more as a chore, an unnecessary part of life. It's not just religion that makes people wary of sex; some just don't want it as much. That, and as kids taught to hide their sexuality, we are used to trying to climax for the sake of speed, and not enjoying the whole process, taking time, and experimenting.
It's something worth talking about, because you'll be able to find out what he does really want if you push it enough, or you'll find out that he is more important than passion, and your drive will be left to drift off. I can actually understand him feeling dirty in a bad way for overt sexuality if he's not used to it. If he's used to you as his girlfriend and wanting him as your boyfriend, it's a bit alienating to change into a girl who looks and acts nothing like the girl he wants. Maybe try transitioning with some talk but still looking like yourself, or put on simpler outfits while still behaving like yourself, so that he can ground the moment as still being with you, while allowing his mind to wander. As active as I can be, I can still find it a bit alienating to see someone who is nothing like my partner trying to turn me on in the way that I would only want my partner to.
You're not too horny for your own good, you just need to find the right communication to figure out what works for each of you in the bedroom, as well as lifestyle-wise. I know I hate letting my girl do all the work; I can't even think of having sex until she's begging for it or has climaxed, and I won't climax until she's had at least a couple. If you can figure out the right mix, maybe he won't be so tired, and maybe he'll find he wants to make more time for the both of you, maybe even waking up early for you, since a woman's clock peaks in the morning, unlike a man's peaking late at night.
Of course, what do I know, I'm just a random internet person, shucks