I feel let down. I feel betrayed . I feel a load of bullshit was fed to me. I feel lonely. I feel like i dont fucking deserve this. I feel enclosed trapped. I feel souless, and feel fustrated . I feel unheard . i feel worse. I feel angry. I feel no one believes in me. I beleive i must have a sign on my head that must say leave now . YES I AM BEING A COW IN THIS ENTRY AS IM IN A BLOODY HORRIBLE MOOD AND THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. All this rant your with your family.Mums at work Derick is working and Kelan is at school. GOD IM SO SURROUNDED BY SUPPORT. All my friends are busy with their own lives.So here it is folks i really have hit rock bottom and i have to find away alone to pull myself out. Im not actually annoyed with the male species which is wierd.Tom im sorry if read this but it is how im feeling at the time and does not necesarily mean you.However,i do beleive that despite my grief i had fun with you, you made me laugh. Yes im selfish and the most of the time you saw me insecure that was just because i wanted to be worth something because i had lost someone. 