I am incredibly tense and incredibly annoyed right now. I'm not exactly sure why because there are so many reasons for me to be pissed off, but if I don't allow my mind to ramble on in this tiny little journal then I'll become a health hazzard or a murderer, I'm leaning towards both at the moment.
My mother has severely screwed me up. I don't understand her, she gave birth to me and yet she's like a stranger. She's never really taken much interest in me, what with her husband needing so much attention, but apparently today is the day she chooses to change her cold and isolating ways. She thinks because she flicked through a leaflet on depression then she's suddenly an expert on everything I've been struggling with. Perhaps it's selfish and petty but I cannot see myself forming a relationship with her. I just feel like I've been dying for her to reach out for me for so long now that it's just a case of too little far too late.
I've joined the writing school, and nobody is particuarly impressed but I can't wait and I suppose that's all that matters. I just hope my obscure ideas don't frighten anybody off.
monkeybutt:
when you are younger, you're ostracized for being an outcast. when you get older and want to be a writer, obscure ideas make you a shitload of money. if you're the only person impressed with being in the writing school, who gives a shit? isn't that enough? good luck.
monkeybutt:
ah, another two week sabbatical. how's the writing?