So the big work project is finally boxed up and sent off to the north dakota super fund site. I had school yesterday so I just stayed at work afterwards and caught the last bus of the day home. Today was my first day off in a while and I spent it by sleeping in and then looking around for auto body shops and getting estimates. The damage to my car is pretty minor, but it looks like it will be a hassle to get parts and replace everything. It's just the headlight and grill, but it's so weirdly done that I really don't want to deal with it. It's just that the simple things with cars I don't like letting others do. Like changing a tire for instance. If you can't change your own tire then you're less of a man. It's a fact, look it up. Oil changes too, but I still go to jiffy lube. What am i going to do with 5 quarts of used motor oil? Anyway, I can tell replacing the head light and grill is doable, but it's going to be a hassle and take an afternoon. Oh, and I have to go to a wrecking yard. I wonder if they still have those 'You pull it' ones? Those are kind of fun and it's been years since I've done that.
Ya, work-school-work-work-school. I'm being so studious. And I'm actually starting to like matrix algebra. For some weird reason I love tedious number crunching where your answer takes up a page. I must be sick. I haven't even skipped a class yet except once for a work emergency that needed my immediate attention.
Also today, I went and bought some books and cassette tapes. My car has a tape player
so i went to this music store that sells old tapes for $2. I got digital underground, pretenders, bob dylan, buddy holly, cowboy junkies and some other stuff that i got out of hopes of making a random musical discovery. My books were a commentary on the gateless gate (it kind of sucks, but the koans are translated slightly differently giving them a different perspective) and a book of japanese zen poetry. I like the poetry book a lot. Here's two:
Old age deepens
the love
of mountain life.
Dying by the cliffside:
my bones
will be clean.
One Moon shows
in every pool
In every pool
one Moon shows
Speaking of zen, i tagged along to venice's introduction to meditation. I've always wanted to go visit a master and present my understanding in the old school fashion. Not out of pride or ego, more of a reality check. I like to think that reality is my bible, but i guess i have too rich of a fantasy life to really believe that. My zen style is entirely self taught and I don't do it the way that anyone else does. All the sitting for instance and doing zen a 'particular way' is not for me. Still it would be nice to meet someone who is a master and at least touch bases and compare notes. We may be approaching things from different directions but we are all still striving for the same truth.
Anyway, I don't think that it would have worked with them. Their head guy was taking interviews, but just in the context of meditation. Also, i didn't get a sense that he was any more enlightened than anybody else that i've met. Not to say that i didn't learn anything from him or anybody else there. When the student is ready, the teacher appears is more of a comment on a receptive, beginner's mind than some mysterious guru showing up when you're ready to commence training. Some aproaches i liked were the bowing to nothing, the emphasis on 'suchness' or the inate nature of things, and i also liked the tea and cookies afterwards. Their chants sucked though. I think that they just translated the words but not the spirit of some old chants. It felt like dead leaves falling off the dharma's tongue. I did respect their sincerity though. They didn't seem like certain so-called christians that i can think of that are only pious before the alter. I don't know, I might go back but I really don't feel like i fit in there.
Speaking of enlightened people, I've met three that may qualify. Oddly they were all women. Go figure. One I didn't recognize at the time, but that was before i started studing zen. Another I haven't heard from in a very long time (she comes and goes, but I've occasionally noticed her around). The other i heard about though the grapevine but was too bashful to speak to. So I really can't say if she is or not. I did get that vibe from her though.
Well it's almost 3am and i'm rambling about zen nonsense. One more comment and then it's bed time.
Ya, work-school-work-work-school. I'm being so studious. And I'm actually starting to like matrix algebra. For some weird reason I love tedious number crunching where your answer takes up a page. I must be sick. I haven't even skipped a class yet except once for a work emergency that needed my immediate attention.
Also today, I went and bought some books and cassette tapes. My car has a tape player
so i went to this music store that sells old tapes for $2. I got digital underground, pretenders, bob dylan, buddy holly, cowboy junkies and some other stuff that i got out of hopes of making a random musical discovery. My books were a commentary on the gateless gate (it kind of sucks, but the koans are translated slightly differently giving them a different perspective) and a book of japanese zen poetry. I like the poetry book a lot. Here's two:
Old age deepens
the love
of mountain life.
Dying by the cliffside:
my bones
will be clean.
One Moon shows
in every pool
In every pool
one Moon shows
Speaking of zen, i tagged along to venice's introduction to meditation. I've always wanted to go visit a master and present my understanding in the old school fashion. Not out of pride or ego, more of a reality check. I like to think that reality is my bible, but i guess i have too rich of a fantasy life to really believe that. My zen style is entirely self taught and I don't do it the way that anyone else does. All the sitting for instance and doing zen a 'particular way' is not for me. Still it would be nice to meet someone who is a master and at least touch bases and compare notes. We may be approaching things from different directions but we are all still striving for the same truth.
Anyway, I don't think that it would have worked with them. Their head guy was taking interviews, but just in the context of meditation. Also, i didn't get a sense that he was any more enlightened than anybody else that i've met. Not to say that i didn't learn anything from him or anybody else there. When the student is ready, the teacher appears is more of a comment on a receptive, beginner's mind than some mysterious guru showing up when you're ready to commence training. Some aproaches i liked were the bowing to nothing, the emphasis on 'suchness' or the inate nature of things, and i also liked the tea and cookies afterwards. Their chants sucked though. I think that they just translated the words but not the spirit of some old chants. It felt like dead leaves falling off the dharma's tongue. I did respect their sincerity though. They didn't seem like certain so-called christians that i can think of that are only pious before the alter. I don't know, I might go back but I really don't feel like i fit in there.
Speaking of enlightened people, I've met three that may qualify. Oddly they were all women. Go figure. One I didn't recognize at the time, but that was before i started studing zen. Another I haven't heard from in a very long time (she comes and goes, but I've occasionally noticed her around). The other i heard about though the grapevine but was too bashful to speak to. So I really can't say if she is or not. I did get that vibe from her though.
Well it's almost 3am and i'm rambling about zen nonsense. One more comment and then it's bed time.
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After that I'll be going back to work. I need to figure out why my doo-hicky keeps winking it's LEDs at me. I'll probably come home early though because I have math tomorrow morning and I'll need to get more sleep than usual.