stina

That.. my friends, is a drug rug. And let me tell you what! they are hideous. If you own one.. don't take offense.. im trying to do you a favor. Burn it. on fire.. until its gone. tthank you.
So.. tonight i had a suprisingly sad chat on the phone.
My first real love.. my first real relationship.. He's a very "extreme" person.. skiier.. photographer for a pro BMX mag.. BMX blah blah.. skydiver, hiker.. blah blah.. all that junk. And he's been hurt a lot. Ive defiantely visited him in the hospital and seen him unable to move before. Due to injuries. Anyway..
I guess he fell riding bmx.. and smacked his head.. again. LAst time he got a broken face bone that now floats around or some shit. this time he broke his bnose. .and made his brain bleed internally. It really stresses me out. He had soem operation i think he said.. but they wanted to do more.. and drill his skull.. but he refused to let them. So.. he has blood floatign aroudn in his skull? I mnot sure. But he has a lot of dizzyness.. and has been sick. Can't hold down food.. so he's losing a lot of wieght. He hasnt been able to mvoe around or do anything.. or read. It worries me.. because he gets depressed at times liek this.. and he reads a real lot. So.. I jsut worry about him. He wont go back to the Dr..
We might not be dating, and we probably wotn ever again.. but that doesnt change how much i care about him. Its so hard to watch someone be so destructive.. even if accidental.. ITs so hard to not be able to do anything.. I jsut want him to be safe and happy. And I cant anythign for either aspect.