Second to last exam in the morning Woooo! Last on Thursday will be celebrated with excessive alcohol consumption.
Just wish I could concentrate a little more on revision atm!
Its been a weird couple of weeks. I've been practically emotionally barren for months now... and all of a sudden it feels like the floodgates been opened. Struggling with having so many completely conflicting emotions when non of them seem to make sense and most of them seem to be the exact opposite of what I think I should be feeling. Typically this would have to happen in the middle of my exams.
Went back to my old hall of residence a few days ago to pick up some of my things i had left there. I moved to a new one after my "friends" near enough caused me to have a nervous breakdown, completely abandoning me and in some cases actively making my life hell for months as it was easier to maintain their own social lives that way rather than give me even a hint of support after I was assaulted by an ex-resident they had invited to the hall. It wasn't pleasant having to face those people again. Especially when even now the most positive reaction i got was a smile and an "alright?" from one of the people who caused me the most problems, while everyone else either regarded me with clear discomfort or just completely blanked me. Didn't know whether to be hurt, angry or pitiful of them.
It never ceases to amaze me how people can behave sometimes. Also never ceases to amaze me how naive i can be sometimes about the moral standards and backbone of the population in general... or why i so readily trust people again and again only to be let down. Usually in spectacular style.
Feel a little better for that
Guess I should stop finding excuses not to revise... and cross my fingers for the morning.
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Its been a weird couple of weeks. I've been practically emotionally barren for months now... and all of a sudden it feels like the floodgates been opened. Struggling with having so many completely conflicting emotions when non of them seem to make sense and most of them seem to be the exact opposite of what I think I should be feeling. Typically this would have to happen in the middle of my exams.

Went back to my old hall of residence a few days ago to pick up some of my things i had left there. I moved to a new one after my "friends" near enough caused me to have a nervous breakdown, completely abandoning me and in some cases actively making my life hell for months as it was easier to maintain their own social lives that way rather than give me even a hint of support after I was assaulted by an ex-resident they had invited to the hall. It wasn't pleasant having to face those people again. Especially when even now the most positive reaction i got was a smile and an "alright?" from one of the people who caused me the most problems, while everyone else either regarded me with clear discomfort or just completely blanked me. Didn't know whether to be hurt, angry or pitiful of them.
It never ceases to amaze me how people can behave sometimes. Also never ceases to amaze me how naive i can be sometimes about the moral standards and backbone of the population in general... or why i so readily trust people again and again only to be let down. Usually in spectacular style.
Feel a little better for that
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Guess I should stop finding excuses not to revise... and cross my fingers for the morning.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
xoxo, CC
New house, new start. You seem to have been through exactly the same shit I have, only difference I met a girl who turned out to be just a bit scarier than Charles Manson.
Hold your head up high, get to counselling. It really does help, i know it sounds fucked, but it does!!!
The studying thing is hard after such a kick in the knackers, but you just gotta say i'm not going to let those loosers fuck my life up and take a stand
you look smart, and pretty, you can easily ace this shit. Good things xXx